Reason to Live
by mihoyonagi
Summary: ."I went home to die, and ended up with a reason to live." The story of Vincent Valentine, and how he came to understand his need to move on, guided by an unexpected companion - Yuffie/Vincent
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: It is to be noted that I, mihoyonagi, take no credit for the characters appearing in the story, unless they are derived from my own mind. Yuffie, Vincent, and the rest of the Final Fantasy VII crew, as well as the game and plot itself, do not belong to me and in fact are property of Square-Enix, nor do I receive anything in compensation for writing this story, fiscal or otherwise.

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 1

I went home to die, and ended up with a reason to live.

I wasn't sure how it started, or really when everything began to move toward what I should have seen coming, but it sure as hell did. It could have been all at once, or it could have been gradual – to be truthful, I hadn't paid it much attention.

What am I talking about?

Let me start over and try to rearrange my thoughts.

Two years ago, almost to the day, we purged the planet of Sephiroth, one of the strongest, not to mention most insane, beings on the planet. His dreams of conquest, of god-hood, vanquished, he submitted to the call of the lifestream, even though none really believed he deserved peace after what had transpired.

I guess a large part of that was my fault, really. In fact, the gaping majority of it had been due to me, and everything only snowballed afterward. But that's why I had started to travel with Cloud in the first place- after I heard Sephiroth still lived, my conscious wouldn't allow me to lie dormant in my self-implicated prison any longer. He would be my last piece of retribution for the wrongs committed, or at least I had planned.

Funny how fate doesn't really give a damn about anything you plan.

I was in love with his mother. Lucrecia was everything I had wanted, nothing I didn't, and yet was completely and utterly out of my league, though it didn't come as much of a surprise. I was a freshman Turk, unsullied and only just out of training. My father had gotten me the job, and later helped me transfer so that I could be closer to him. Our relationship was never strained, but it was never really that normal either. I think he had Shinra transfer me so that he could watch over me, but that's just assumptions. I was never good at discovering what was on his mind.

I was assigned to be Lucrecia's bodyguard. The specific department of science she was involved in, biotechnology, had received threats after Lucrecia had published a few thesis papers regarding the entity know as Chaos. She worked directly under my father.

I'm not really sure when I fell in love with her, but I do remember wishing she would favor me with one of her beautiful smiles all of a sudden. Occasionally, I would sneak her out of the lab and we would have picnics and observe the scenery. I remember nearly having her affections – charm goes a long way, after all, and I did my best to win her over – but then, all at once, everything changed.

The entity she had been studying in captivity, the being she thought was Chaos, had broken though its cage. As a result, my father, ever the ladies man apparently, died in his attempt to save Lucrecia.

I know now that she had blamed herself, even though I knew it was never her fault. I never threw even so much as an ounce of guilt her way, and I never blamed her for anything.

She didn't seem to see things my way, however, and began to distance herself from me. She fell into the arms of the man with whom my father worked with – a twisted excuse for a man named Hojo – and later married him. Be it for love, or just to get away from me, I'm not really sure. It was months later, after little to no communication, when she came to me, tears in her eyes that fell down to stain the pretty lab coat she wore so well.

She told me she was pregnant.

I wished her happiness and luck, and she accepted them with a smile, though I knew she secretly knew I still loved her.

It was what she told me next that made me lose my respect for her.

She was going to offer her baby up for experimentation.

The being found deep within the crater of the northern continent, named Jenova by those who excavated her, had been mislabeled as an Ancient, a Cetra. It wasn't long afterward that the biotechnologists at Shinra realized their mistake, but it was still too late – Lucrecia had already injected herself with a large dosage of concentrated Jenova DNA as well as a larger supply of Mako than was considered safe.

She named her baby, the first and last motherly thing she would ever do for her doomed child.

Sephiroth, she had told me after she decided.

Hojo stole the baby after it was born, and Lucrecia came to me looking for help of any kind. I had tried to reason with her when she had been pregnant, yet it was only after she understood what she had done did she feel the need to wish her way out of the nightmare. How ironic.

But Hojo would have none of it. He suspected Lucrecia and I were having an affair; something I suppose I regret wasn't the truth now that I contemplate it. He shot me in front of her, nearly killing me.

Ever the one to play God, Hojo strapped me to one of his exam tables and did things to my body and mind I can't begin to relay. Words do not do justice to what was done to me, but I knew I had none other to blame but myself.

I suppose if I had been stronger I could have shown Lucrecia my true feelings, and her baby wouldn't have been born into such a life. I suppose I could have stopped her when I knew of her plans to use her baby for the sake of science.

Suppose in one hand and shit in the other, and see what you have more of.

I have Chaos inside of me thanks to Hojo's handiwork, and a metal attachment for a hand that creeps up nearly halfway to my elbow. Chaos' appearance slowly overlaps mine, though it took me nearly an entire year to notice the change. It was first my eyes – they changed to a deeper, wine-colored red than previously – then my hair – it grows now at an alarming rate – and then the rest of my body gained attributes not associated with humanity. I found myself able to run at alarmingly fast speeds, able to go days without food, or even able to put myself into a state of suspended animation, so long as I could still breathe.

I only lost my temper with Chaos once. That was all it took.

I can't recall much of the occasion, but what I remember was absolute rage consuming me. The next thing I knew my consciousness was pushed aside and a completely different being took charge of my body, willing my limbs to do its bidding.

It was terrifying.

I never lost control after that, though, on dire occasions, I was able to find I could control Chaos for a short period of time.

I guess to say that everything started nearly two years ago would be a blatant lie. Everything started the day I fell in love with Lucrecia, but things only started to turn decent for me two years ago.

After the defeat of Sephiroth, Holy's power, aided by the prayers of Aerith I'm sure, stopped Meteor from crashing into the planet. I remember bright lights, and fountains of the lifestream breaking through the crust of the earth, holy Meteor in place in the sky as though it weighed nothing. Meteor disintegrated.

The planet still loved its children, it seemed. I still find it hard to believe that a large rock floating in space could have a will to survive, a well as express love and mercy for those that lived on its surface.

Then again, I have a metal hand and a demon inside of me, so, now that I think about it, a sentient planet doesn't seem too strange.

After we all knew Meteor was gone, the sweeping relief that flowed over the planet was felt everywhere. From Cosmo Canyon to Mideel, even in the slums of Midgar; all life on the face of the planet let out a collective sigh. The birds sang louder, the tress rustled without a breeze; everyone was happy.

Well, not everyone.

We were in the Highwind a good day after everything. The bridge's windows gave us the brilliant glow of the ocean at dawn. I remember Tifa beginning to cry. I remember Cloud trying to pretend he wasn't sad.

But the fact of the matter was that, even though we were all thankful to be alive, we missed our flower girl.

Despite the fact that I had spent a great deal less time with her than anyone else, it still felt as though there was a great pressure on my chest. I knew that it would be hard to say goodbye, but none of us really felt like we could let go. It was within that first week that Cloud had handed out the ribbons to us.

They were pink. One for each of us.

No one said a word about them, they merely fastened them to their persons, and went about their business.

But it wasn't simply Aerith.

There was still a deep chasm, a terrible and suffocating pressure, in place of my heart. I grew confused. Sephiroth had been slain and everyone had been saved.

Why, then, did it hurt so badly when I thought of the people I traveled with.

It was in the depth of the third night after we had returned fro the crater that I left.

Call me selfish, but I couldn't stand their happy faces any longer. I wanted out, and I wanted out fast. I told no one where I was going, but I am sure they could guess easily enough.

Even with the hole in my chest, the duties I had imposed on myself had been fulfilled and my life was thusly meaningless thereafter. Perhaps that's what I seemed to be dreading so much; maybe because I knew it was finally my time to go, I was actually scared.

I'm not one for irony, but even I cracked a smile after I thought of that one. Me, finally able to die, but too scared to.

I didn't know if I could feel any more, save for the cold and the hurt. It sounds overly-depressive, but I really felt hollow inside, like I had been unplugged and all of my emotions had just drained out like old, piss-warm bath water.

And so, with a heavy heart and an even heavier conscious, I made my way back to Nibelheim, down the winding stairs of the ShinRa mansion, deep into the cellar, and finally, standing before my coffin, I realized that there was nothing left for me. I took a deep breath, reached for the lid and-

The footsteps I heard overhead sounded as though someone were running whilst Bahamut was nipping at their heels. I paused and concentrated, trying to listen for patterns in the steps. Before I was able to discern who it was obviously trying to rouse me from the sleep of the dead, I heard the hidden doorway slam open, and the thundering feet began to descend the stairs.

I stood there, with one foot, quite literally, inside of my coffin, and waited for whomever it was to barge into my basement sanctuary and try to persuade me from lying down inside my casket. I had no words, and I knew nothing I could say would prevent them from thinking less of me, but it was my life and my journey was coming quickly to a close.

Or so I thought.

Funny how fate doesn't seem to give a damn about what you think, either.

Even though I tried to mask my surprise when the door swung open to reveal none other than Yuffie, I knew my mask had slipped. My young companion who, when compared to all of the others from the motley crew I'd traveled with, I knew the least about, wore a look of absolute rage across her face. She was dripping wet; I took a guess that it must have been raining out.

I opened my mouth to speak, though I'm not sure why – she was too far gone for words at her point – and found myself flinch when she began to stalk toward me.

"You bastard!"

Her voice was shrill, full of hate and anger.

It was all directed toward me. A flicker of emotion flared up – guilt, perhaps – but quickly died when I realized I didn't owe anyone else anything, least of all the young woman who walked toward me.

"You ignorant fuck! Do you have any idea what you're doing?"

I took a deep breath, straining to keep my voice from breaking. "I came to die, Yuffie. I own nothing else to the world. I've finally absolved my sins, and now I can sleep peacefully forever."

Her hand flew out before her, her pointer finger jabbing me in the chest. She was a head and a half shorter than I, but Yuffie was oblivious to such a small detail. Her rage made her feel a million times larger than me, I'm sure.

"We already lost Aerith. Now you pull this bullshit by trying to die on us, too? Do you have any idea how upset everyone was when they found out you left?"

I faltered. "Yuffie, this is how it has to be."

"It hurts when people you care about die – I'm sure you know better than anyone, seeing all the shit you've had to go through – yet here you are trying to just up and keel over on us all, paying no nevermind to anyone else's feelings for one damn second!"

I took a step back. She wasn't full of rage.

She was full of hurt, of sadness, and it was my fault.

Everyone had felt so lost after Aerith's death. I pondered for a moment; would they be just the same were I to fall away from life?

It seems I can't live without hurting others. How is that for irony? I try to correct my mistakes, I try to make things better, and I only screw it all up even further.

"Yuffie, this is my choice."

"Fuck you, Vincent Valentine!"

I saw her hurt. I read it in her eyes.

I didn't see the balled-up fist come sailing toward my face, however.

Funny how fate is a bitch like that.


	2. Chapter 2

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 2

My body might heal faster than what is normal, but it still hurt like hell when Yuffie punched me square in the face. Tiny little fists of iron, she has.

I sat there on the cold, stone floor of the basement, gaping up at her, blood running freely from my nose. She stood over me, a surprising giant despite her smallness, with a look of such hurt on her face that all cognitive thought shifted out of my brain for a few moments.

Why couldn't I stop hurting those around me?

I wiped the blood from my face with the back of my gloved hand. "Yuffie-"

She stamped her foot, indicating that she wouldn't hear anything that fell from my lips.

"Do you have any idea how hurt we all were when Aerith died? You were there; you should know! Why would you put the rest of us through something like that again? You keep spitting this garbage about penance and how you need to 'redeem' yourself for all of your sins, but here you are right back where you started from!"

She crossed her arms, and I noticed for the first time that she was shaking. I realized that she was holding back tears.

"You wrong one person, thinking you've done right by another. You're running in circles, and you can't stop, and you sit there and bitch about how no one can help you."

Her hand came out, and she pointed an accusing finger directly at the center of my chest.

"But, goddamn you Vincent, you never even bothered to ask for help in the first place!"

I watched as the tears she was trying to hard to hold in began to roll down her cheeks in great waves. Her voice cracked as she dropped to her knees before me.

"I don't want it to hurt any more. I don't want to lose any more friends."

She cradled her hands in her face and let out a choking sob. Despite the tears on her face, she was trying to not to let herself completely break. Hunching over, she wrapped her arms around her knees and buried her face against her legs.

We sat there like that, in complete silence, for what seemed like hours. When I noticed that she had finally stopped her quiet sobbing, I stood and sighed.

"I need ice for my face."

I don't know what compelled me to say it, but when Yuffie looked up at me with swollen eyes and puffy cheeks, I knew I said the right thing. She stared at me for a moment, bewilderment crossing her features, before moving to get up, then followed me, without a word, out the basement door, up the steps, and into the kitchen of the house.

The freezer was bare, save for the few obligatory trays of ice cubes jammed in the back. I took one out and held it to my face. While I knew the tissue was already healing itself, the idea of facial swelling was unappealing. The ice would help make it so I didn't bruise. In some ways, the semi-mutant body I was housed in did have its appealing aspects.

Yuffie was in the doorway of the kitchen, hands crossed across her chest. Her nose was red, her eyes somewhat bloodshot, and her cheeks were slightly pink.

"You look like you've been traveling for awhile." It was more of a statement than a question.

She shrugged in response. "When I found out you left, I knew you'd come here. Cloud and the others wouldn't turn the damn ship around, so I jumped off and went by foot."

I paused, closing the freezer door. I had left in the night nearly three days ago. I hadn't taken my time returning, so she must have been at my heels the entire time. Knowing I hadn't stopped to rest for more than a few hours, I cringed inwardly. Sleep wasn't something my body often craved, as a normal human body might. Though I still needed to sleep, the time my body needed to remain asleep was minor in comparison.

So I automatically knew she was tired and hungry.

I looked to her, holding an ice cube to my face with one hand, while motioning around the kitchen. "I have nothing to feed you."

Her body shuddered, most likely an after-effect of having cried so hard. "I'm more tired than I am hungry."

"You need to eat," I pressed. I could go days without consuming food, but I knew her body was most likely weak from malnutrition by now. She was thin as it was, and starving herself so she could chase after me was a terrible idea.

Then again, I was to blame.

"Would you like me to get you something to eat? You'll be able to rest easier once you're fed."

Yuffie shook her head. "You and I aren't going anywhere until we work something out."

I fought the childish urge to roll my eyes. "You need-"

"Don't tell me what I need, Valentine. Don't even start with me. I don't want to hear your excuses or your bullshit. You're not going anywhere, do you understand me? You're not leaving us. I'm not going to lose any more friends."

I bit my tongue. This far into the conversation, I knew there was little I could say to her that would change her mind or her heart. She was right, though.

Aerith's loss had been hard on everyone, even me. I thought I was past feeling that kind of remorse. Hell, I thought I had distanced myself far enough away from everyone that I wasn't susceptible to such heartache.

Apparently, I was fooling no one. Not even myself.

Yet, here I was, pretending that none of the others – my friends, or at least the closest thing I had to such – would even bat an eyelash once I were to leave them.

I couldn't see the truth, despite it sitting in front of my face.

No matter how much I owed Lucrecia, I still owed Cloud and the others at least a little more of my time. After all, my body was immortal. The planet was rid of Sephiroth, ShinRa was failing, Jenova was gone, and Hojo was dead. What was a few decades suffering the company of those I had already spent time with? It was a lot. But had the rest of eternity to sleep, once everyone else was gone.

"Promise me you won't go anywhere, Vincent."

"Yuffie, I don't think-"

"I know, and that's the problem."

Pausing, I took a deep breath.

Damn, she was blunt. Painfully blunt. But at least she meant well.

"I won't go anywhere."

My compliance seemed to stun her. She stood there for a moment, as if she were measuring me.

"Promise?"

"For now."

It was most likely not the answer she was looking for, but it was apparent that hunger and exhaustion was beginning to wear her farther than even she thought she could go. For a moment, it looked like she was going to argue. Her hesitation made me weary; I wasn't prepared to bicker any longer.

She let out a sigh, seemingly content with my partial answer. "What do you have to eat?"

I didn't smile, though I was feeling rather relieved she didn't push the matter further. "Nothing here," I replied. "But I can go into town and procure a few things for you. There is a room with clean bedding upstairs, if you'd like to nap."

Again, she hesitated.

"You're not going to disappear on me again, are you?"

I shook my head.

It was about time I stopped running from my problems.

"Good, because if you leave I'll hunt you down and kick your ass. And yeah, a nap sounds good. Can you get me some peaches?"

Ah, she had good taste in fruit.

"I'll get you some peaches. Go sleep. I'll wake you when I return."


	3. Chapter 3

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 3

She was sleeping when I returned home, stretched out upon the musty mattress of the bed in the guest room. Most likely in a last-ditch effort at cleanliness, she had stripped the bed of sheets and was arranged in what looked like a most uncomfortable position. The bedding hadn't been changed in Bahamut-knew-how-long, and I didn't blame her for ridding the four-post bed of the linens.

I placed the bag of peaches on the bedside table. I felt at once when she had woken, and when I turned to her and saw her eyes open I knew had sensed me walk into the room.

"You came back." It was a groggy statement, said with leaden eyes.

"You're half-starved and exhausted. Of course I came back."

As if on cue, her stomach growled. I plucked a peach from the bag I had only just set down and tossed it her way. She caught it with ease, and I surprised myself with the small amount of admiration I awarded her with. She had sensed me, even in sleep, and her reflexes were good- perhaps her talk of being the best ninja didn't go completely without merit.

She bit into the peach and smiled, pleased with my offerings. I tossed her another after she had finished, and one more after that. She handed back to me the pits, and I tossed them into the bag.

"If I go to sleep again, will you leave?"

"I won't leave. I'll be downstairs."

"In the foyer, not the basement?"

"In the kitchen, not the foyer, or the basement. I bought a few things for you, other than fruit."

She eyed me, cautiously. "If you leave, I'll hunt you down and kick your ass."

I didn't smile, though I knew she was trying to see one from me. "No doubt you would. Sleep. I'll be downstairs when you wake up."

Shutting the door behind me, I vacated the room before making my way down the curving staircase. I found Yuffie's PHS on the kitchen counter, a forgotten piece of her ensemble that was most likely left there when I had pressed ice to my face. When I picked it up, it rang in my hands.

I paused, unsure if I should answer. Yuffie needed sleep, I surmised, so I flipped open the device and pressed it to my ear.

"Yuffie's phone, Vincent speaking."

"Oh, planet, she found you."

It was Cloud.

I took a swallow of air, suddenly finding that my throat was dry and tight. "Yes, she found me."

"Well, where is she? What happened?"

I was quiet for a moment. "I won't seek my death just yet. She made me see that I would be missed. I'm taking care of her. She's sleeping."

Cloud sighed. "You gave us a scare, you know that? We don't want to lose any more friends."

"Funny. She said the same thing to me."

An uncomfortable pause stretched out between us. "I understand your motives."

I didn't reply.

"I understand your motives, but I don't agree with what you want to do. You're our friend. We-"

I cut him off, suddenly feeling somewhat annoyed. "Don't try to understand me or my reasons, Cloud, because you won't. You think you might, but you're not even close. My whole existence since Hojo's experiments has been a battle inside of myself, my mind, and I'm afraid to admit that I don't know what parts of me are human any longer. Would it be so wrong to be selfish and wish for a peaceful ending?"

Another pause. Cloud was collecting himself. "Sometimes, it can't be about us. You have to look at the bigger picture."

I knew he spoke of Aerith, and her selfless sacrifice. She had offered herself on the alter, a prayer wrapped in pink, so that everyone else could try their best to live happily ever after.

But that is where Cloud and I would never see eye to eye. There was no happily ever after. Sephiroth may have been gone, but worries and troubles still persisted. The only reason I wasn't sleeping was because I didn't want to make these supposed 'friends' sad- I didn't want to be the reason for pain in another person again. I knew there was no happy ending to my story. The least I could hope for was a peaceful death.

"Kindly stop trying to analyze me. I have my reasons for wanting to die, regardless of how wrong you may think them to be. For the time being, my plans have been put on hold. I don't wish to make anyone feel the same hurt that was felt when Aerith was stolen from us, but I won't change my mind. When the time is right, when I know that no one will miss me, I'll fade from the face of the planet. It will be my decision."

I hung up the phone, agitated.

My anger had bested me. I heard a sniffle from the doorway. Turning sharply, I was met with Yuffie's heartbroken stare. "Please don't go."

The level of annoyance I was faced with only increased. I tried taking a deep breath, hoping that I hadn't stirred enough rage to wake Chaos, but when Yuffie made to move toward me I forced myself to go numb. Her hand – how small she seemed compared to me – reached out and took my sleeve in a tight grip. "Please, Vincent, don't go. I'd miss you."

Her statement both soothed and enraged the beast. Her child-like innocence stroked my ego – someone would actually think of me with fond memories were I to perish – but her blunt honesty angered me; who was she to change my mind? She was but a child, an infant, in comparison to me, and she held little right to make me feel bad for wishing to end my tormented life.

"Go back to bed." I turned, tugging my sleeve from her grasp. I still struggled to sedate my emotions, keeping my face calm and my insides from boiling. Confused and irate, I ran a hand through my tangled mess of black hair.

"Stop being such a jackass."

Damn her ability to get a rise in me.

I spun to face her, swallowing a wave of anger that I was beginning to fear was growing too large. "You come to me when you know I want nothing more than to die, you insult me, you punch me in the face, and you make me feel remorse for finally seeking the eternal sleep I'm entitled to. _I'm_ the jackass?"

She rolled her eyes, crossing her arms, not deterred in the slightest by my bitterness. "You fight by our side, you help us save the world, you become our friend, then you think no one would miss you if you up and died, even though you saw what it was like when we lost one of our own. I called you names and popped you in the face because you damn well deserved it. So yeah, Valentine, _you_ are the jackass."

I took the deepest breath I could, reminding myself that I was arguing with child-like logic.

"Give it up, Vincent. She'd dead, and there's nothing you can do about it."

She was only feeding the fire. Didn't she see that her words weren't helping? "Don't you dare bring Lucrecia into this, Yuffie. Don't you dare-"

The expression on her face gave away the fact that she was grinding her teeth before she exploded. "Grow up! She's gone, and there's nothing you can do about it! You're letting her ruin your life, and she's not even alive!"

That was it. I stomped toward the door she was blocking, aware that Chaos was just itching for release. She reached out a hand to block me, but I was past conversation. Taking her wrist, I pushed her through the door and out of my way.

I walked into the pouring rain and the dusk, ignoring Yuffie as she screamed my name.


	4. Chapter 4

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 4

It was hours before I calmed down. Before I knew where my feet were taking me, I found myself at the grave of my once beloved. At first, I couldn't look up at her. I couldn't bear to. The anger in my heart was ugly, and I wished none to see, not even myself. I paced back and forth, trying to still my frantic thoughts.

It was nearing dawn before I allowed my tired legs to sit. I pressed a hand to the crystal that encased Lucrecia's body, looking up with a heavy heart.

I understood, when I looked at Lucrecia's face why I was so angry.

Yuffie and her words weren't the reasons for my rage.

It was the truth behind them, and my inability to see it.

Lucrecia was my excuse for living. Her memory, the revenge and penance I felt I owed her, was a thing of the past now that Sephiroth was a distant, distasteful idea. Hojo, too.

What else did I have left?

My inability to let go had been my driving force for decades. My hate, my anger, ruled me, oppressed me. Truth is meant to set you free, but it sure hurts like a bitch. Animosity is far easier to hold onto than reality.

I stood, understanding now what I had been seeking within myself for years. Forgiveness was about self. I don't think I could ever forgive myself for what passed, for what I let happen, but accepting it was a larger first step than I thought myself capable of.

Too much hope is the opposite of despair, while an overpowering love has the power to consume you...

Pressing a hand to the crystal, I let the name of woman I loved more than life slip passed my lips once more.

"I'll do it right this time."

Yuffie's words held more truth than she could ever understand. I needed to let go. I needed to move on. I was letting memories rule me.

When the right time came, when I knew the world wouldn't mind if I took my eternal sleep at long last, I'd allow myself to die.

But for now, someone needed my company.

It was well into the morning hours before I returned to the mansion, and the rain had long since ebbed. The sharp smell of lemon cleanser assailed my sensitive nose as I opened the door. I looked around, startled at what I saw.

The entire place sparkled, or at least shined as best it could given how old and musty most of the furniture was. The sound of a vacuum let me know exactly where Yuffie was. I followed it, appreciating the attention to detail she had obviously taken as I traversed a good majority of the house. The walls had been scrubbed, as well as the floor, the lamps had been dusted and polished.

I found her in the room she had taken refuge in earlier.

She turned off the vacuum when I entered the doorway, her back facing me.

"So you did come back." It was more of a curious statement than anything else.

"I apologize for my behavior earlier. I shouldn't have been so terse with you."

She paused when I had finished speaking. I watched a small tremor wrack her body. When she turned to face me, I knew from her swollen cheeks and red eyes that she had spent the greater part of the morning in tears. The Yuffie that stood before me was more woman than I first acknowledged, not quite so child-like, her sadness proof of such. Her normally fierce facade had slipped, allowing me to see the emotional turmoil beneath.

"She died when I was seven."

I blinked in confusion at her.

"My mom."

"My apologies."

She swallowed hard. "My mom was sick, since before I was born. The doctors weren't sure how she was able to give birth to me and live, but she always told me it was because she loved me. She loved me so much, she willed her body to stay alive. But, strength of will is a lot like strength of body; no matter who you are, at one point you're going to give in just a little. Most people can recover. Mom couldn't."

I watched as she wiped her tears away with the back of her hand.

"That was right around the time of the war. Right after she died, ShinRa took over and Wutai fell from the great, proud place it once was into a bumbling, piece of shit resort town."

I blinked, engrossed. I knew, first hand, that Yuffie had never opened up about her past. It was pure fluke that we had the misfortune of finding out Wutai was her home town, and that Lord Godo was her father. Our materia was passed through many hands that day.

"After mom died, and Wutai fell to hell, I ran away from home. I couldn't bear to think that the Wutai my mom had loved so much had been turned into such dump. I started stealing materia then, thinking that if I had enough it might ease the pain a little. I though that maybe, just maybe, I could restore Wutai."

She scoffed at herself, rolling her eyes. "Didn't turn out so well, but then again few of my plans ever do. Fact remains that when mom died, it was the hardest thing I had faced in my life. I've been on my own since then, at least until I met up with Cloud and the others. Aerith was... in her own little way, what saved me. She taught me that it was okay to get close to people, that having friends wasn't always a pain in the ass. Then she had to... she..."

A choking sob echoed through the room.

"And when she died I felt so empty, Vincent. I couldn't stand it. I would close my eyes and see her lying in a pool of blood. The only thing that kept me going was the want to avenge her. I wanted so bad to kill Sephiroth, even though I knew it was more Cloud's fight than mine. When he was finally gone I... I didn't know what to do with myself. I realized that I had to let go."

She looked at me then, her eyes still bloodshot.

"And that's when you left, and I knew I had to follow you and make sure you didn't do something stupid."

I shifted my weight from one foot to another. "I'm not really sure what to tell you, Yuffie."

She shrugged in response. "It's okay. It was probably going to be depressing anyway. I'm sorry I brought up Lucrecia. That was low, even for me."

"No." I took a step toward her. "You're right. I need to let go. It's not healthy to let my memories rule me."

Her expression grew shocked, as if I had slapped her across the face. It was obvious that she hadn't been expecting such a reply from me after the shouting match we had participated in earlier.

"I meant it when I said I didn't want to lose any more friends."

"I'm sorry."

She fell toward me, latching on to the front of my coat. I hadn't been expecting it, and I staggered back a step. She sobbed against me, her entire body shaking with the effort to keep standing. Emotionally drained, physically exhausted; I was amazed she had remained standing for so long.

"Why is it so hard, Vincent? Why is it always so god-damned hard?"


	5. Chapter 5

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 5

There wasn't anything said between us for the rest of the night. She cried against me until she had nothing left in her. Then, with sad, dull eyes she went back to vacuuming the carpets.

I left the room, not knowing what to do with the situation, let alone myself. A few minutes later I heard the machine turn off, followed by the distinct sound of the floor creaking as she eased herself onto the mattress.

I thought, dimly, about returning to the basement and spending the night in my coffin, but thought better of it. I could just imagine how the morning would play out before me: Yuffie would thunder down the stairs and I'd receive another good right hook to the face.

Which was the last thing I was looking for, to be honest.

So, resigned, I settled myself into the cushions of a musty old couch near the foyer and crossed my arms against my chest. I'd told her the kitchen, but I didn't feel like venturing there for now.

Sleep was something my body needed little of, given its state, but if I found myself comfortable enough I could easily fall into a bit of a nap. So, bearing such in mind, I closed my eyes and fell off into a light doze.

The eerie of the quiet house is what roused me not long after I'd fallen asleep.

One of the main descriptors used when thinking of Yuffie Kisaragi is, more often than not, loud. Sure, obnoxious is strewn in there more times than is comfortable, but I'd rather like to stay polite, if it can be helped. So when I say that Yuffie was within the walls of the house, and the entirety of the estate had lapsed into utter silence, it was enough to make one's skin crawl.

Not mine, per se, but the idea is understood effectively.

While my body remained motionless for the remainder of the night, and well into the bright hours of the early morning, I didn't fall back into slumber. I was tired and my mind drained, but I didn't wish to close my eyes again.

She'd be hungry when she woke up.

I hadn't purchased enough food previously to accommodate another meal for her.

The idea was bizarre, as it had not stemmed from a previous thought; it simply jumped into the forefront of my brain as something that needed attention. It was early enough that I didn't have to worry about her waking before I returned, so, feeling just as acquiescent standing up as I had felt when I'd sat hours before, I trudged my way to the door and out into the bright sunshine of the day.

I'm a morning person, oddly enough. If it hasn't been mentioned before, it's because the topic hardly ever comes up in conversation: it's not really how you introduce yourself to another person, nor was it something I'd ever felt the need to share. Little of my life I felt I needed to share with anyone, so most of the perks and flaws (mostly flaws) of my character were unknown. I think the most people know about me is my favorite color, and my date of birth.

It's green, despite my attire, and the dreaded date falls on the thirteenth of October, in case there were any questions.

Despite being loud and, if you were feeling impolite, obnoxious and overbearing, there was much to Yuffie that remained a mystery to me. Sure, she forced her opinion upon the group until we felt our ears would bleed, but there wasn't much about her past or her personal preferences – aside from her massive affinity for materia - that I knew about.

Or, if she ever had mentioned something, I had ignored her.

It was cruel of me, I understood, but even a saint's patience may wear thin.

I'm no saint, let it be clear.

It was odd walking through the farmer's market at such an early and odd hour of the day. Workers were out, setting trays and tables with wares to sell throughout the day, but customers this early were few and far between.

Perhaps the lack of people was why I was more the morning person. I know plenty of people who'd sooner stay up all hours of the night rather than wake a few hours early to enjoy a sunrise, but to each his own.

I got a few looks from those manning the stalls, but no one said anything.

No one was going to, either.

Who'd want to approach a man with a metallic hand and three-barrel pistol? Not many in this town, such is for certain.

Despite the eyes that followed me, I took my time and picked my way through the mealy bits of fruit and found things I figured Yuffie might like. Whatever she didn't consume I would, so it wasn't as though anything I purchased would go to waste. I filled a burlap sack halfway with both familiar and exotic fruits before I was satisfied.

I purchased some veggies as well, but nothing too odd- I wasn't sure how picky an eater Yuffie might be, and I didn't want to get stuck eating something bizarre and unappetizing because I hadn't known what I'd bought.

The butcher also had his store open, which suited me just fine. I requested various meats, paid the man, and was sent out of the store with a nod from the butcher in thanks for the money I'd spent.

I returned to the house and put away the things I'd bought, resolving myself to try and clean the fridge soon. It wasn't dirty, really - the shelves had been bare for years – but the idea that it hadn't been touched in equally as long brought out the need to clean.

Yuffie's PHS, still sitting on the counter from the night before, buzzed merrily across the counter. I didn't want to talk to Cloud again, but not answering the damned thing would make him fret – or panic, if I knew him.

"Yuffie's phone, Vincent speaking."

"Hey, Vincent." Tifa's sweet but deep voice resonated through the receiver.

Relief washed over me; thank Odin it wasn't Cloud.

"Hello, Tifa. Yuffie is still sleeping."

I heard a chuckle from the other side. "I know. That's why I called. I was hoping to talk to you for a minute."

The relief was short lived. I was already being analyzed by Cloud; I didn't need Tifa ganging up on me as well.

"Yes?"

There was a pause. Then, Tifa cleared her throat.

"You try anything stupid like that again, and I'll break your legs."

I couldn't help the fond smile that crept across my face.

"I understand you – a little better than Cloud, at least – and I don't blame you. But I'm not going to sit here and tell you what you want is bad. I just don't want you committing suicide on my time, got it? I have better things to do than attend your funeral, Valentine."

Her words were stern, but I could hear the kindness hidden behind them.

"Yes, Tifa."

"Promise me something?"

I sighed. "I don't keep promises very well."

"Just don't do anything stupid, alright?"

"No promises."

"Keep Yuffie out of trouble."

"That's harder than what you asked me before."

"...Vincent."

"I'll do my best, Tifa. I owe you that much."

"Then I guess it's all I can hope for. Take care, and tell Yuffie I said hello."

"Goodbye."

I hung up the phone and placed it back on the counter.

"Who were you talking to?"

Damn her sneakiness. I'd grown too accustomed to her presence, too accustomed to having her and the others so close around me, that I'd forgotten how to reach out and sense them. She was familiar; she was what my senses considered normal, after traveling with her so long.

I brushed the slight look of surprise off my face before I turned to look at her. "It was Tifa. She says hello."

"Anything else?"

"Yes; that she'll break my legs if I try anything stupid."

Yuffie yawned. "She always comes up with the best ideas."

I let it slide, given how sleepy she looked.

"Care for some breakfast?"


	6. Chapter 6

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 6

It was six days later and, without so much as asking my permission, or opinion, Yuffie had moved into the house with me. She left one afternoon and returned the next morning with a bag of her clothes and a few personal items and that was the end of it. It bothered her when I went to the basement – I could give an educated guess as to why – so I made my room the one across the hall from hers. It turned out to be more of a challenge to sleep in a bed than I'd thought possible.

I wasn't sure the last time I'd slept in an actual bed, aside from the few nights of the journey with Cloud that had allowed us a safe, dry night in an inn. Those were few and far between, but the sounds of the night and the wilderness put to rest my inner demons. The call of the darkness eased my consciousness into sleep, despite the fact that my body didn't need much of it to keep itself going. It was an odd feeling knowing that there was no lid atop, no coffin bottom beneath.

It should have been a relief.

Perhaps later it would be.

She was an odd thing when she became serious, Yuffie. She and I cleaned out the kitchen cupboards and scrubbed the fridge until it shone like materia when you opened them. We filled the shelves and pantry with anything and everything she fancied. I'm not sure where she got the money to pay for it all, but she managed to come home with the food in bags so I figured she hadn't stolen it.

It was another month after that in which she began to settle down (and by settle down I mean slowly ease into the somewhat irritating, hyperactive kleptomaniac she was before).

Settlers, from who knows where, began moving into the town since Shinra has ceased usage of the reactor in the mountain and monsters venturing into town became a rare oddity. One family in particular purchased some land right outside the town and began construction on a general store of sorts, much to Yuffie's excitement.

I wasn't one for company, and more people in the town meant more people for me to avoid. There were already abundant rumors floating around town about the few times I'd been seen on the streets, and Yuffie always loved to tell me about any new ones when she came home from the market.

Her favorite was that I was a vampire, and she was the poor, abducted maiden kept under mind control. Imaginative, these people.

She was a reader, which surprised me at first. It wasn't as though I thought her uneducated or dull. Reading is often something you sit still to do, and sitting still was something I hardly saw Yuffie do. Though the lack of television was something I was sure to hear complaints about later, it wasn't much of a problem to begin with. She would cook to amuse herself – simple things like cookies or cakes - or draw (another talent I wasn't aware of her possessing).

She coated the walls of the room she commandeered as her own in quotes from her favorite comedians. There were a few philosophers in there somewhere, spouting beautiful ideas about how you should always look to the path ahead, and feeling noble because we are made of the same stuff as stars, but it was mostly hidden behind throes of expletives that were the end of a rather tasteless joke.

It was dusk, and I could hear her restlessness. She paced the hallway.

"Yuffie."

She didn't reply vocally, but I could feel her eyes on me in reply.

"Stop that."

I heard her snort. "I'm bored." She didn't have to announce it; I could easily read it.

"Read a book."

"I don't have any new ones."

I turned the book I was previously engrossed in and laid it flat against my knee. Leaning forward in my chair, I sighed. "Then go get a new one in town."

She huffed at this idea. "I don't want to go into town."

I was glad the hair in my face hid the rolling of my eyes.

"If I go into town and get you a new book, will you stop pacing?"

Deliberation was a strange expression when it was plastered to Yuffie's face. Deliberating isn't something Yuffie did; she was more impulsive than a wild chocobo.

She shrugged her shoulders at long last. "I'll stop pacing if you get me a **good** book."

I took a deep breath to stop the urge of sighing. "Your definition of good?"

"I want lots of action. Maybe some character death. A little romance – but not too much – and the main character has to have a cool name."

Scrunching my eyes together, I met her gaze. I was thinking she'd answer with "sci-fi" or something just as odd. Her response was a shrug. "If it's crap, I'm just going to annoy you more with my pacing." Well, that was an argument I wasn't going to take further. I sat my book down on the couch next to where I'd been previously enjoying it and stood.

I don't think I'd ever get used to the stares that were constantly focused on me while I ventured in public. Even out of my leather garments and cape I suppose I was still slightly formidable-looking. I was taller than most people in the town – a strange trait for someone with so much Wutain blood in them as I – and I'm sure my tangle of long, black hair didn't help in making my demeanor look any less scary.

The small corner store near the outskirts of town had a desolate selection of books, so I bought three that I hoped would appease the restless ninja who had invaded my home. None of them were what she was looking for, but the small selection meant less of a chance for me to find any book to satisfy her. I paid the shopkeep, who, when I approached the counter had abruptly straightened and looked rather frightened. I left, declining the offer for a bag.

She was still pacing the hallway when I returned. Somehow, I knew she would be. Stubborn girl. I handed over the books, returning to the seat I'd occupied before she'd sent me on her silly errand. The face she made as she read the back of the books was that of disgust. Undeterred, I picked up my own book and returned to reading.

"These books suck, Valentine. You have crappy taste."

I ignored her attitude. "What was I supposed to do, Yuffie? The selection is poor; this is a backwater town. If you want good literature, take a trip to Rocket Town and visit a real bookstore."

She snatched my book from my grasp before I realized what she was doing. Her smile was playful, and somewhat demeaning. I had never been one for playing games. I leaned against the back of the seat and closed my eyes, bowing my neck to rest of my chin.

The scoffing noise she made amused me, if only slightly. "Vincent, I'm bored!"

"I'm not your babysitter, Yuffie, and you are not a child. You're old enough to entertain yourself."

"Oh, you're no fun! No damn fun at all!"

"Fun isn't something I'm accustomed to, if you hadn't noticed." My eyes remained closed.

She was silent for a moment. "Either that was a joke, or you're being a dick."

I couldn't help the small smile that twisted my lips at the corners. Hearing her swear wasn't novel – in fact, it was something I was rather used to – it was simply her choosing to call me the most mundane, unimaginative of insults that made any situation somewhat funny.

"Oh, laughing now, are you? Fine, I'll go outside. At least then I'll be away from you and your dickishness."

Dickishness? Well, there was a word I wasn't aware was part of any language.

I heard my book fall to the floor as she tossed it over her shoulder and headed for the kitchen. The backdoor slammed with a hard thump.

I sighed peacefully to myself, thankful that she'd stopped her damned pacing.

Three hours later, and well into the night, I heard her stumble through the back door. I heard her footsteps as she made her way toward where I sat; I hadn't bothered moving since she'd left me. In fact, I had been lighting dozing before she'd ventured back through the kitchen door.

I opened one of my eyes to look at her, aware of her standing in front of me.

Her hands on her hips, dirt smudged on her face, knees, and elbows, she smiled at me. The grin she wore was devious.

"What did you steal?"

She had the gall to look offended at my accusation. "I didn't steal anything."

"Fine. What are you planning on stealing?"

She huffed and stamped her foot, apparently becoming impatient with me. "I'm not gonna steal anything! I want you to guess what I found!"

I despised guessing games.

"I give up."

"The game doesn't work like that, Valentine!"

"I don't like the rules of this game, then."

"Too bad- you have to play."

"Materia?"

The grin returned to her face.

"Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a winner!" She thrust a hand at me, nearly jabbing me in the chest, and presented to me her newest possession. The green orb tried to shine underneath the layer of dirt and grime that had somehow accumulated around it.

"It looks like it has seen better days."

"Materia is materia!"

"Where did you find that, anyway?"

"Up by the mountain, where the town ends and the path starts."

I narrowed my eyes. "What were you doing up there? You know the mountain is still home to monsters."

"I climbed down a crater, traveled all around inside the crust of the earth, fought a crazy son-of-a-bitch who wanted to kill everything, no to mention the tentacle alien that was his mommy, and you're worried about me not being able to take care of a couple oversized bugs?"

"Dragons still roam around- you know that."

"I could kick their asses, too."

"I'm sure you could."

She didn't hear the sarcasm I had laced my words with, thank Shiva.

"It was pretty well stuck into the dirt. It looked like someone had dropped it and then an entire caravan had trampled it into the ground."

I was thankful for the slight change in subject. "What is it?"

Her face turned wicked. "Fire."

Just what I needed- a kleptomaniac with a slight tendency of pyromania.

"And it's almost morphed, too- if I took down a couple of those bug-things, I bet I could get Fire 2 tomorrow!"

Well, at least she'd opted for tomorrow. I wouldn't have to worry about her traipsing around in the dark, looking for giant stick-bugs to fry. Instead, she'd do it in broad daylight.

"Hey, I'm hungry."

I raised an eyebrow, inclined to know just what she expected me to do about it.

"Come eat something with me. I want company."

"I thought you didn't like being around me and my dickishness."

Yuffie turned toward the kitchen, shoving the materia orb into her pocket. "Doesn't mean I want to eat alone."

I followed her, not completely certain as to why. Perhaps it was just morbid curiosity. Or, just perhaps, I was feeling a little lonely myself.

"What would you like to eat?" I opened the fridge and we both peeked inside.

"Nothing heavy; I'm tired and don't want a meal that's going to make me feel like crap."

"Pasta is light. We have beans as well. We could make a sort of pasta salad."

I heard the snort of laughter she tried to hide. "Yeah, sure. Okay mom."

I stood, looking down at her. "I can just as easily remove myself from this room and not cook you dinner, Miss Kisaragi. I offered to be nice."

She sobered up and shrugged her shoulders slightly. "Pasta salad sounds okay. With some orange juice, maybe."

"We don't have enough oranges for fresh." I pulled the egg noodles from their bag in the cupboard next to the fridge. "You'd have to make it from the frozen stuff we bought the other day."

She didn't say anything else, merely made her way to the freezer and pulled a can of frozen orange juice concentrate from the icy shelf. We both went about our own business, I rinsing the beans from the can I'd opened, and she stirring the lump of frozen citrus juice until it melted in the pitcher. After her juice was pronounced a success, she pulled half a cantaloupe from earlier in the day out of the fridge and sliced it up for us.

It wasn't long after that out small meal started to actually come together. Spiraled egg noodles, kidney, garbanzo, and green beans with fresh cut peppers; the whole concoction was topped with a drizzling of oil and vinegar, as well as a fresh grating of cheese.

Even if she had a weak spot for chocolate, Yuffie seemed to mostly eat healthy things. I suppose, when stopped to think about the matter, it made sense. She was on her own for a while, and lived off what she could. Either she developed a taste for healthier, fresh foods, or she ate so much junk and processed food on her own journeys that she didn't want to eat much more of it. Either way, I was happy- processed foods were harder on my system. Comes from having things in your body all have different tastes, you know; no one can agree anything.

Yuffie set the table while I mixed the salad. We ate mostly in silence, Yuffie loading her plate with seconds before I'd finished my first helping.

"I'm going to bed," she announced, unceremoniously tossing her dished into the sink. "I'll clean up in the morning."

I finished my plate, then placed my own dishes in the sink next to hers. I looked up as she scooted past the kitchen door toward her own room.

She had the books I'd bought for her held tight against her chest.


	7. Chapter 7

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 7

The next day, she took to exploration again. This time, however, it was daylight, and she had moved her journey from the foothills of the mountains to the banks of the river. I wasn't sure which I was more fond of; the idea of her being food for a mountain-dwelling dragon, or a water-dwelling dragon.

I suppose I shouldn't complain- she wasn't venturing alone on the mountain, which is what I warned her about the night before. And, well, at least the sun was out.

She came home a little before dinner time with three kinds of seashells, a piece of glass that had been rounded and fogged from the water and shone pink like the sky at dusk, and a scale that was deep blue lined with light purple.

"I thought, at first, it was a Leviathan scale," she admitted.

I took the scale and held it up to the light. "It's too dark to be a Leviathan scale," I pointed out.

She shrugged, slightly defeated. "I know. Once I got a good look at it, I could tell."

Dinner was just as quiet as the night before, but this time Yuffie cleaned the dishes after we ate, and I dried them.

"Hey, Vincent?"

"Yes, Yuffie?"

"Have you been to a lot of places?"

"I've traveled with you, Cloud, and the others nearly halfway around the world and back."

She pulled the stopper out of the sink and let the soapy water flood downward into the drain.

"That's not what I mean."

"What is, then?"

"Have you, like, stayed in lots of places? Not just traveled through them, but actually met some locals and eaten their food and really gotten a feel for the place?"

I went silent.

Most people are smart enough to know not to ask of my past, or ask about places I might have been to or have seen before we'd met. Yuffie wasn't the sharpest shuriken in the box, true, but I had a feeling she knew exactly what she was asking me.

But, I also knew why.

Yuffie's curiosity often got the best of her. Even though she wouldn't admit it out loud, she was an ardent scholar in the sense that she loved to hear and learn about other people and places.

She, however, had a short attention span, which is most likely why people don't catch her attention often enough for someone to notice her insatiable curiosity.

I suppose the short-winded way of explaining her personality would be that she's curious, but very picky, where both traits seem to fall on the rather extreme side.

"I've been around the world, but I haven't actually visited many places."

"Oh." She wiped her hands dry on the dishtowel that hung around the faucet of the sink. "Like where?"

Quiet overtook me again, and I stilled my hands from their drying duties. "Costa del Sol; Icicle Inn; Midgar; Juno; standard places for a Turk to be sent."

"Cool."

It was obvious she could tell my mood was quickly turning sour, for she changed the subject. "Want to go out to the forest across the river with me tomorrow?"

I raised a cautious eyebrow as I set the dry dish away in the cupboard. "And why would I do that?"

Yuffie smiled, cheerfully. "Because you hardly go out of the house, and I don't want to explore all alone tomorrow."

I weighed the situation in my head. She was right, no matter what angle I looked at; ignoring my little outing to purchase her books the evening before, I hadn't ventured outside much since she came to stay with me.

"Not for the whole day. Perhaps half."

"Sweet! We can pack a lunch, and you can help me level up my new Fire materia, and-"

Oh, Shiva, I'd started a vocal avalanche in her, hadn't I?

Well, at least she'd stopped asking about my past.

Yuffie wasn't at all a morning person, which suited me just fine. We ended up leaving the house later in the morning, but armed with a backpack full of food.

I don't think I'd been on a picnic since Lucre-

I stumbled, and nearly tripped.

It had been several months since I'd last though of her. Yuffie's company had kept my mind constantly in motion and unable to dwell over one idea long.

"You okay?"

Gaining my footing back, I looked up. "Fine. My shoe simply caught a rock."

She turned away, unaware of the uncomfortable state of my mind. "Well, try to be more careful. Why you can't just wear normal shoes is beyond me."

"Yuffie, knee-high laced shoes are hardly practical" A debate with her would serve to clear my mind. It always did; her logic was something I still had to figure out.

"They are comfortable, they look stylish, and if I fall out of a tree I won't cut my leg to Ifrit's grave and back." Her tone was matter-of-factly, as if I had no right to question her fashion sense whatsoever in the first place.

We rounded the top of a clearing that put us at the top of a hill, surrounded on one side by deep, thick forest, and on the other by rich, rolling fields of grass.

Yuffie looked to me with a sad smile. "Reminds you of more peaceful times, doesn't it?"

She was more grown-up than I'd given her credit for, it seemed.

We sat and ate our lunch in silence, watching the light breeze weave patterns across the long stalks of wild grass.

When we finished our food, Yuffie stood and wiped off the dirt from her legs. "I don't feel much like exploring anymore. At least not for today."

I looked up at her, curious. "What, then, do you propose we do?"

Her face was blank, her eyes unfocused, her mind planets away. "I just want to go home."

I packed up the bag and slung it over my shoulder, contemplating Yuffie's sudden change in attitude. Depressive wasn't like her.

"Are you alright?" I didn't want a long-winded explanation, but I knew that if I didn't ask I was going to regret it later.

She walked in front of me, just like before. Though I couldn't see her face, I knew she wore a solemn expression on it based off her tone of voice. "Just remembering happier times."

We were halfway home before she said anything else. "It looks like home."

"Wutai?"

"Yeah. It looks like the fields outside the city, right after you get out of the mountain pass. All that grass in front of you, and sheer cliffs behind you. The sea to both sides."

She fell quiet for another long while.

"And, I guess, it reminds me of her a little bit."

There they were; her reasons- homesickness and a broken heart.

I changed the subject, knowing that if I did nothing she'd slide further back into herself.

"What would you like for dinner?"

"I'm not really hungry. I think I'm going to take a bath and go to bed when we get home."

"Yuffie, it's two in the afternoon-"

"I know what time it is, Vincent."

It was a curious thing, to hear her tone of voice almost spiteful.

"I wasn't the one who took her away, Yuffie. I'm not the reason you can't go home, either, so taking your anger out on me isn't a decent solution." It was harsh, sure, but words of comfort didn't seem to be the medicine she needed. Truth was always the best drug, no matter how painful the taking might be.

She taught me that.

"Sorry," she bit out after another long silence stretched between us. "Shit's just messed up."

My voice was quiet, and I felt silly, but I knew what I needed to say to make her feel less helpless. "You have friends to see you through it. You're not alone."

She didn't speak again until we made it back home, but the mood had lightened considerably.

I fumbled with the key to the front door, a precaution Yuffie had insisted when she first moved in, claiming that she needed to feel safe. Little in the world was scarier than me, but I didn't want to argue with her so I told her I would install it if she bought it. When I finally had opened the door, she pushed past me and entered the foyer first.

"Thanks."

"I've done nothing you need to thank me for. You'd just forgotten."

She placed her hands on her hips, her back facing me. "I want grilled fish for dinner."

And that was how the day ended; us cooking dinner with Yuffie shooting jokes of rather bad taste my way the entire time.

At least she'd stopped being depressive. That was a start.

Now if only I could get her to speak less…

When I woke the next morning, having drifted off for a few hours after finishing my rather unsatisfactory novel, I knew she wasn't in her room. It was fairly early for her to be up, true, but it was Chaos that woke me in a panic. I could feel unease coursing through my mind.

That was the problem of having so many things inside of my body- there was no outlet, only the most basic of communication. It was like trying to discern what was written in a foreign language when you've never even heard of the country. I could get feelings like anger and remorse, but the problem was trying to figure the cause. Chaos lay mostly dormant, uncaring in the ways of my personal affairs; so long as he wasn't affected by my actions and thoughts, he never bothered me.

When I set my feet to the cold, hardwood floor I knew instinctively where Yuffie had gone. The cold sensation of skin against wood was far more prevalent this morning, meaning that the secret staircase hidden in the extra bedroom was open.

Meaning Yuffie had decided to explore the basement.

No wonder Chaos was in such a fit; the last thing in the world I wanted was Yuffie, or anyone else for that matter, knowing exactly what was housed inside my body. Shiva's thong, even **I** didn't know all that my body was a shell for.

I didn't even bother with the spiral staircase- I jumped down the hole in the middle, landing easily on my feet. Letting my body go still and relaxed, I reached out and tried to pinpoint exactly where Yuffie would be 'exploring.'

That's when I heard it. Faint, quiet sobs, muffled by a thick case.

Oh, for the sake of Ramuh's beard- she was in my fucking coffin.

I kicked the door open. Prying apart the coffin lid, I began to shout.

"What possessed you into thinking this was a good idea?"

Her little body fell to the dirt floor, her knees under her, her breath coming in large gasps.

"Your answer had better come swiftly. I'm not your damn babysitter, and I'm sick of acting like it."

Yuffie's sobs slowed as she tried to regain a normal breathing pattern. I stood above her, still full of rage, and waited for her answer.

"I wanted to see why you thought staying in that musty piece of shit was 'penance.' I wanted to see why you thought sitting in there forever would be better than staying outside with your friends. I wanted to see why you'd take a stuffy box over human interaction."

I was still. It was as if my brain had stopped working properly for a moment, and had to shut down and restart.

"You WHAT?"

"Goddamn it, Valentine! You're such a piece of shit! There's nothing in that box but your anger and your sadness and your bullshit!"

I looked to the upright coffin, my rage slowly dissipating.

I was still pissed, sure, but… She was trying to find out things about me without having to ask me outright.

"Go upstairs."

She didn't have to be told twice, though her actions were sluggish. Her arms wrapped around her upper body as her feet slowly made their way up the creaking, rotting steps.

I let out a deep breath, reaching into my pocket and taking out my phone.

"This is Tifa."

"I need a favor."

"Vincent? Oh, Gods above, what did Yuffie do?"

"I'll tell you about it later. Would you mind picking her up for a weekend at your place? I need some time alone and I don't trust myself to leave the house."

"Sure thing. Cloud and I'll be there by nightfall."

When I returned upstairs, Yuffie was in her bedroom, curled upon her bed.

"I'm sorry."

It was uncomfortable to see her look so weak.

"Tifa and Cloud are taking you for the weekend."

"I didn't mean any harm. I-"

I held up my hand, drawing a deep breath and letting it out slowly.

"I'm not used to so much interaction, Yuffie. This is too much. Apart from the traveling I did with everyone, I've had minimal human contact for the past three decades. I need to be alone for a while, and I don't think I trust myself to leave the house."

"You're kicking me out?"

"You may return when I'm feeling better."

She bit her lip, but at least she'd stopped crying.

"I'm sorry."

"I know. Pack your things."

I left her to herself and I returned to the basement, full of such a torrent of emotions I felt as though my head would spin off my damn shoulders and pirouette out the door. Crossing my arms, I sat in front of the coffin that I, prior to less than a year ago, had occupied for thirty years.

I understood her intentions. Yuffie wasn't the type to do something that would intentionally hurt someone. She'd screw you over in the most interesting way, but as far as actual emotional harm goes, Yuffie simply wasn't the type.

She'd tried to bring up my past the day before. She wanted to know of me, just as she knew of her other friends, but I'd so easily and coldly closed her off.

But that was my nature. The closer I became to someone, the more it pained me when fate, the fickle bitch, deemed it fit to slap me in the face. I'd had my world ripped apart by love and kindness once; I wasn't prone to opening up for anyone again.

Sure, Yuffie had found a soft spot I might occasionally exhibit, but such was to be expected; despite being filled with monsters and demons, I was still human. Perhaps not much of me was still human, but the point still stood.

I heard the front doors open and close hours later, alerting me that Tifa and Cloud had arrived. Heavy footfalls echoing down the empty basement hallway notified me of Cloud's imminent arrival.

"What's she in trouble for?" His voice was calm, like that of a father when his most troublesome child gets sent home from school for being naughty.

"I found her in my coffin, Cloud. I found her inside my goddamned coffin."

I was met with understandable apprehension. "Did she say why she decided to hang out in there?"

"Character exploration, it's to be assumed. I refused to tell her about my past, so she went snooping."

"Yeah, that sounds about right."

"I'm not sure how I should respond to this, Cloud." There- it was out in the open. I hated appearing weak, but what other choice had I? It's not as though I knew how to handle shit like this.

"We'll take her for a few days, and you can sort things out here. Don't think too harshly of her. She worries for you; you should know that."

"Worrying achieves nothing."

"Look, Vincent. She's still young. She's had a pretty strange life. If all she wanted was to learn something about you and you shut her down, can you really expect her to just leave it be? You're as much to blame as she is."

I sighed, knowing he was right.

I hated speaking of my past, but Yuffie, ever curious, had found me interesting which meant that even after this little episode she was still likely to try something just as dramatic.

"When you're feeling less like crap give us a call and we'll bring her back. Teef and Yuffie get along great, and they haven't seen each other in a while so I'm sure I'm not going to get any sleep tonight because of all the 'girl talk' that will be going on."

Ouch. I felt that one. "My apologies."

"Sit here as long as you need to, Vincent, but know this; you and Yuffie are both just about as stubborn as people come. One of you is going to have to give way a little, or you're both going to topple over. Learn to make compromises and she'll learn, too."

I thought bitterly about how it was my house – my life – she'd intruded upon, and how I was already making the compromise of allowing her residence inside the one place I wished be alone.

Then, I though of what an ass that last thought made me.

"You give good advice, Cloud."

"Yeah, well, living with Tifa has taught me all of this. The hard way. She might be more stubborn than you and Yuffie put together.

"I heard that!"

Cloud winced, turning to the door. "I mean it in the best possible way."

Tifa smirked, unconvinced.

It was somehow relieving to watch other people interact. I felt my mood lighten slightly. I also felt somewhat bemused by the fact that Cloud hadn't heard Tifa descending the stairs in the first place.

"Yuffie's ready to go."

"We were just about done talking, anyway." Cloud turned toward the door. "Don't forget, Vincent; push and pull- yin and yang. Relationships, no matter the size, are all about compromise and understanding."


	8. Chapter 8

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 8

It was three days I spent sitting in the basement, wondering what I was doing with myself, before I actually stood up and stretched my legs. I'd been in deep mental turmoil before, but this seemed different; this was self-awareness.

Before, it had been about what I'd done to other people. It had been about what I'd overlooked and what had been, ultimately, the downfall of everything I held close to me. Penance? The more I thought of it the more silly it seemed. All that I had cared about was gone or torn apart, and I thought I could redeem my blatant ignorance by holing myself up in a coffin for the rest of my miserable existence.

The more I contemplated my reasons for initially locking myself up in a box for three decades, the more I realized how selfish I had been. Lucretia took the easy way out; the way I wished, for so long, I could follow. She looked at her sins, realized that she couldn't cope, and decided the world was better off without her. What would have happened had she fought for her son?

I found myself pacing the empty, dark hallway of the library, tucked into the deepest corner of the basement. The elegant chandelier that hung from the ceiling was coated thoroughly in webs left from spiders long dead. I sat on the edge of the oak desk that stood lonely in the middle of the circular outcropping. Research papers, books, and letters lay scattered atop the desk, and nearly everywhere around, as if some madman had ransacked the place, desperate to find something.

Looking to the shelves, I saw something that caught my eye. A tattered book, and a pile of letters.

Yuffie's curiosity was contagious, it seemed. My arm went out and I pulled the book and the pile of letters from the shelf.

It was like a slap to the face.

It was Hojo's research notes about the ancients, about Aerith and her mother, and a pile of letters between my lost friend and someone she held dear named Zax.

Ah, here was something I hadn't known before.

Professor Gast was Aerith's father.

I put the book down, unable to read any more. It made me sick, knowing that Aerith had once been touched by the same tainted hands that had ruined me. Gast had been a good man, but Hojo…

With heavy feet, and a heavier heart, I trudged upstairs and simply walked through the house that had been my tomb for the past thirty years.

It was time to get out a little.

I flipped open my phone and dialed Tifa's number. Her cheery greeting insured me that she and Yuffie were having a good time.

"Hello, Tifa."

"Hey, Vincent. Something up?"

"I wanted to tell you that Yuffie is welcome back whenever you feel you can bring her."

I practically heard her smile. "I think you should talk to her about this."

"Wait, Tifa, I-"

"Hey, Vincent!"

"Hello, Yuffie."

"I heard what you said to Tifa, but how do you know I want to come back?"

My mood dropped a bit. I hadn't thought about Yuffie figuratively giving me the finger after I'd lost my temper like, as she would put it, a douchebag.

Oh, Shiva above and Ifrit below, I was picking up her slang as well as her foul mouth.

"If you don't want to come back, Yuffie, I can pack your things and have them ready for you to come get them. I can-"

"I mean, Tifa painted my toenails last night. How many times, in the past few months that I've been living in that creepy-as-all-hell house with you, have you painted my toes?"

Momentary confusion stuck me in the back of the head before I realized what Yuffie and her smart mouth were doing.

She was goading me.

"I'm afraid I don't have any nail polish, Yuffie, so it never occurred to me to paint your toes."

"You could get me a few colors to make up for the lack of what you've got in stock now."

"Very well. When you get back we can go buy you some nail polish."

There was a silence.

Then a snort of laughter.

"Vincent, you are just too easy; you know that? Like I'd want any of the girly crap."

I ignored the urge to sigh heavily. "Put Tifa back on the line, Yuffie." The smile that Tifa wore was still present, obvious in the way she spoke.

"Hello?"

"That wasn't very nice."

"I know. But you were kind of a jerk the other day, so I figured you deserved it."

"Ah. Valid point. Cloud told you what happened, then?"

"Yes, and Yuffie is sorry, despite the fact that she'll never admit to it out loud ever again."

I heard a loud, indignant "hey!" from somewhere on the other line.

"Bring her back when it's convenient for you. I'm not going anywhere."

Yuffie was returned the next day. With a hug to both Cloud and Tifa, she hopped off the bridge of the Highwind. We stood together, alone, in the large field next to the river outside of town. As soon as the ship was out of view, Yuffie tumbled over and threw up in the tall grass.

I rolled my eyes and looked away, pleased that I had skipped breakfast.

"I hate ships. I hate them so much. Hate, hate, hate-"

Before she could curse the flying machine further, I heard a horrible gurgling sound as Yuffie's stomach took further revenge for the ride on the Highwind.

"Are you going to be okay?" It was early afternoon and while nothing was planned for the rest of the day, I didn't feel like spending my time standing next to Yuffie as she vomited.

"Yeah, yeah: I'll be fine. I can almost-"

Another heave. Wonderful.

Several minutes pressed by, and after I could no longer hear anything I decided it would be safe to turn around.

"It's a good thing I don't have long hair, like Tifa." It was a strange remark for her to make. She looked up at me. "You know; so I don't get throw up in my hair."

Ah, so her comment did have validity given the circumstance, however strange. "Will you be able to walk alright?"

Yuffie stood, her knees knocking together as she tried to keep her balance. "Stupid ship. I hate flying."

We walked toward town, beginning at a snail's slow trudge that eventually developed into a somewhat faster gimp. Once we had to stop; Yuffie thought she had more coming up, but it turned out to be dry-heaves. Not that it was any better than her throwing up in the first place; the sounds she made were still disgusting.

She couldn't help it. I knew it, but it was still gross.

When we arrived back home she took her time with the stairs, and I followed her to her room in order to make sure that she wasn't going to heave in the hallway.

She flopped down, unceremoniously, atop her bed covers. "Leviathan be damned; I've never been air-sick like this before."

I was feeling generous. "Is there something you need?"

She rolled over, punching a pillow and making a groaning sound. "Crackers."

We didn't have any left; I'd have to go to the store. "I'll go get you some. Try to lay still. If you feel the need to throw up again can you make it to the bathroom or should I get you a bowl?"

"No, I can make it if I have to. Barf buckets are undignified for a ninja."

So is motion-sickness, but I wasn't going to say that aloud.

The town was somewhat empty, given the time of day. The sun was high, summer nearing an end, and the heat was nearly unbearable. Most of the residents hid inside to keep cool, and I couldn't blame them. Perhaps the heat was why Yuffie's stomach had yet to relent.

At the small store near the ends of town, the man behind the counter was beginning to grow accustom to my face. I wasn't sure how I felt about this, but at least he didn't think I was a vampire, like most of the younger generation of the town.

I mean, I was going out in daylight, wasn't I? One would tend to think that would debunk the myths of my being a vampire.

This town liked to gossip too much.

The shopkeep nodded to me when I walked past the counter. Bee-lining straight for the crackers, I snagged the box on top and turned around.

And promptly came face to face with a small case of nail polish.

Oh, what an inside joke.

I picked up a bottle of light pink, a color I knew Yuffie wouldn't find too flashy, and set it on the counter next to the box of crackers.

Looking up at me with a slight smirk on his face, the shopkeep rang up my purchase. "Looks like you've got a wild night planned."

I wasn't sure if I was meant to laugh or not. "My comrade is sick, hence the crackers, and I thought she'd appreciate the nail polish."

There was a pause.

"You ain't a vampire, are ya?"

All respect for the shopkeep evaporating with that one sentence. "Everyone is still pushing that rumor around, aren't they? No, I'm not a vampire, and the young lady staying with me is a friend, not my captive."

"Most of the townsfolk saw those two strangers go up to the mansion the other day. The young one was crying when she left."

What was he insinuating? These people needed more excitement in their lives.

"They are my friends, as well. There was a bit of an argument, and I needed some time alone."

A disbelieving glare was shot my way from over the counter. "That little one; she your lover?"

I sighed and rolled my eyes theatrically. "No, she's not. Now, is there some reason for all of the questions, or can I pay you and leave?"

He laughed, which was unexpected, and took the Gil from my outstretched hand without another word.

Oh, Shiva; I could only imagine what he was going to tell the other people in town.

Well, at least he'd asked me out right instead of treating his assumptions as fact, like everyone else in the town seemed to like doing. Vampire? I knew children that had a better imagination than that. Hell, I knew a talking cat that was more creative.

I tossed the bag onto Yuffie's bed when I returned home. I was halfway down the hall before I heard her groan.

"Valentine! I hate pink!"

I smirked, unable to hide my amusement.


	9. Chapter 9

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 9

It was mid November, six months after Yuffie had decided she was going to play the roll of my keeper.

The things that had once annoyed the hell out of me had turned into mundane, everyday occurrences. Thank Shiva that Yuffie was somewhat clean. Her room was messy, yes, but she never left food or dishes in there which meant one less thing I had to do. She hated making her bed, something I'm sure once drove her father insane, but for the most part she picked up after herself.

The only thing she always forgot were her socks. After she would take a shower, I'd use the bathroom and find her socks hanging over the towel bar, or some equally odd place in which socks weren't meant to be. I found one stuffed between the cushions of one of the sofas in the foyer once. When I asked her about it, she shrugged it off and claimed that socks made her feet claustrophobic.

I refrained from asking why the same effect didn't come about when she wore shoes.

For a long while it bothered me, having to pick up her discarded clothing. I told her once that I didn't want to see her socks in the bathroom again unless she was wearing them.

She started throwing them out into the hallway, something she did, I'm sure, just to piss me off.

Instead of growing angrier, despite the fact that deep inside I contemplated it, I bought a clothes hamper. I told Yuffie that if I saw her socks on the floor, instead of in the basket, I was going to cut them up, and throw them away.

She smiled at me, mischievously, keeping her mouth shut. I knew she was plotting.

Two days later I found her socks laid neatly atop the pillow in my bedroom.

I took a pair of scissors to them, shredding them to the point that no one would have been able to tell they were once socks, and placed the scraps in a neat pile atop her pillow.

I didn't find her socks on the floor again. Occasionally, I'd find one draped over the edge of the basket, as if she were tempting me, but so long as they were at least halfway in the hamper I didn't much care.

The afternoon was chilled, not quite bitter cold, but enough that you could easily see your breath if you dared a venture outside. Threatening clouds loomed overhead, but they only teased us with the prospect of a cold autumn rain. The wind that blew made the house echo with an eerie sound.

I found Yuffie in th kitchen, humming quietly to herself, fretting over a bowl of what looked to be cake mix. Egg shells littered the counter top, while flour decorated a portion of Yuffie's face.

"Making cake?" She jumped when I spoke, and I inwardly smiled. She may have been able to sneak up on me on the rare occasion, but I knew it was even rarer for her to hear me coming.

"Yes. Chocolate, with cream cheese frosting."

"Any occasion?"

She paused for a moment, then ignored the question and went back to pouring over the cookbook.

Uh-oh. Something was wrong. Yuffie stopped her humming.

"Is there something I can help you do?"

"Are you bribing me?"

"I want a piece of the cake when it's finished."

I knew she smiled, despite the fact that her back was to me.

"What's worth a piece of cake to you?"

"Half the dishes."

"All of the dishes."

"Half the dishes, and we can let them air dry."

"All of the dishes, and I'll let you lick one of the beaters."

"You drive a hard bargain, Kisaragi."

"Take it or leave it, Valentine."

"Deal." We shook hands, and while I walked next to the sink to prepare to clean the measuring cups that were already soaking, Yuffie went back to her recipe book.

She set the timer on the stove after depositing the cake in the oven, then handed me one of the batter-covered beaters when I was finished drying my hands.

"They were huge when I was little."

I shot her a sideways glance as I scraped batter from the beater onto my finer, licking it off. Yuffie skipped the middle man and simply licked the beater.

"What was?"

"Birthday parties."

A poignant silence fell over the kitchen. Yuffie licked at the beater again.

"When I was little, my birthday used to be a big thing in the city. Daughter of Godo, Princess of Wutai, flower of Leviathan; everyone wanted to gift me with precious things in hopes I would take favor on them when I grew old enough to rule. I was an only child, and despite being a girl I was still meant to rule one day."

I looked over on the counter and saw the box of candles lying by themselves.

Yuffie had baked herself a birthday cake.

"You were a princess?" It was a stupid thing to say, but my mind couldn't wrap around the rest of it.

"Still am, or at least the basic equivalent of one. Technically, even though my father and I don't talk much any longer, I'm still in line to rule since he hasn't denounced me as his heir."

"So you're going to rule Wutai someday?"

Yufie nearly chocked on the batter. "Hell no. When that old geezer dies the council will take over and I won't have to worry about that shit ever again. Let Gorki and Shake worry about it."

What a dirty little hypocrite.

"Yuffie Kisaragi, you gave me such shit when I-"

"Vincent, don't even start with me. Do you have any idea how much responsibility it would be to keep up with a city I turned my back on? The people wouldn't accept me as their ruler, and I know I wouldn't be able to win them over. I'm trying to live my life for me; I want to experience all that the world has to offer, not sit around on a cushion eating fancy meals and hearing about how well the rice fields are doing."

The silence between us was bitter.

"Women can't rule Wutai. Not offically. In order to let me rule, my father would have had to find a man for me to marry. The last time I visited Wutai before the little episode with Cloud and the gang, I was fourteen. I heard that my grandmother was ill, so I went to pay my respects. I loved gran a lot, but not enough to stay. My father tried to get me to stay. He tried to guilt me into it, saying that gran wanted to see me marry before she passed. I was fourteen, Vincent. Fourteen."

Another bitter silence.

"I still want glory to return to Wutai. I want to be proud of the city I call home. That's why I still scrounge what I have, and jack materia wherever I see it. I haven't given up on my home. I just can't let it rule me any more. I have to be my own person, with my own dreams and ideas."

I saw her point of view, clear as day, sprawled out before me. She was angry with me for trying to kill myself because she felt that life needed to be lived, that nothing should be done half-assed, and that you should enjoy every minute of your existence, meaningful or not. No one should tell you how to go about your day if you have plans of your own.

It was simple. Realistic as well, so long as you were an optimist.

It still didn't make up for the punch in the face she'd given me half a year ago. Not completely, anyway.

I saw, now, why Aerith's death had upset Yuffie so much. Our ever kind and gentle friend, the one who went out of her way to make sure others were happy before she could rest, was dead. Aerith wouldn't smile again, wouldn't laugh again, wouldn't have the chance to find love and happiness.

She was still so innocent. Her view of the world wasn't a fair one, which perhaps is what gave her so much hope, but it was realistic. When life gives you lemons, use them to lure a chocobo and get the hell out of there.

The timer on the stove buzzed, and Yuffie donned a pair of oven mitts to pull the cake out. It smelled pretty damn good, considering the mess she'd made making it.

The mood lifted significantly.

"Happy birthday."

"Any excuse for cake, right?"


	10. Chapter 10

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 10

The day after Yuffie's so-called birthday, I promised to, in order to make up for the lack of gift, allow her to pick out something at the general store that was being built on the outskirts for town when it opened.

Her eyes had gone wide as saucers, and she squealed.

"Anything?"

Oh, no. I never said anything. "Anything within reason, Yuffie."

I don't know if she heard me or not. Her eyes had glazed over with the prospect of getting something that she wanted without having to lift a damn finger for it, other than having to point it out to me, of course.

Well, it was my own fault when, twenty two days later and still true to my word, we were arguing over what 'within reason' meant.

"You said anything within reason, Valentine! Chocolate is reasonable!"

"A five pound brick of Costa del Sol's finest chocolate is hardly what I'd call within reason, Yuffie."

"But it's my birthday present!" She stamped her foot, like a impatient child.

I covered my forehead with my hand, trying not to become flustered in public. She and I had been arguing like this, back and forth, for nearly five minutes.

"Yuffie, I'd honestly rather you ask for my mastered Cure materia than this."

"Really?!" She sounded like I was about to give her the winning lottery ticket.

I sighed. "It's a figure of speech. Do you honestly think I'm going to get you five pounds of chocolate? I know how you are around chocolate- the entire brick of it will be gone my morning, and you'll puke it up. And guess who is going to have to clean up your vomit, and baby you when you get the worse stomach ache of your life?"

"Leviathan be damned- Vincent, you're a dirty liar!"

Now people were starting to stare.

I bit my tongue to keep from snapping at her. "Fine. We'll compromise. I'll get you two and a half pounds, and we split it up so you can have some each day for a while, instead of gnawing on the whole damn thing at once."

"But I-"

"I know how you are around chocolate, Yuffie. You claim you'll be good, but as soon as I turn my back you will stuff yourself silly. Two and a half pounds, divided into pieces so you can have some each day, or none at all."

She stuck her lip out and pouted. "You're so mean!"

"Mean? Two and a half pounds of this is still going to cost me over a hundred gil. Costa del Sol chocolate is expensive. You're getting something for nothing. Take it or leave it."

Her nose scrunched, and she glared at me.

"Fine."

We divided the chocolate up when we got home, though she refused to say much to me the rest of the night.

I was quietly reading one of the newer books I'd borrowed from the library when Yuffie stomped up to me. She looked rather agitated.

Looking up from my book, I cocked an eyebrow. "Yes?"

She held out a bag of the chocolate we'd divided up, though she stayed silent.

I smiled, though only slightly. "It's yours. Keep it. I'm sorry I couldn't get you more."

She shook the bag at me, though still refusing to speak.

"Yuffie, I-"

"Dammit, Valentine; just take the bag. I'm offering you a truce. You didn't have to buy me anything, especially since my birthday was last month, but you're nice like that. So I want to share some of my spoils."

I held out my hand and took the bag, knowing that if I were to refuse again I might get the bag thrown at me. It wasn't often Yuffie shared anything, much less offered a truce.

Perhaps she was growing up.

"We gonna have a winter solstice party?"

The question caught me by surprise. "What day is it?"

She shrugged, easily. "Next Tuesday."

I didn't want to host a party, even if only for two. Still, I didn't want to earn Yuffie's scorn after just reaching somewhat of an agreement.

"How about we go out of town for it?"

She smiled at me, her eyes large and full of excitement. "You mean it?"

"Why not? We shouldn't be stuck up in this house all winter long."

I was going to regret this. Oh, Shiva, I knew I was going to regret this with everything fiber of my being. I hated social situations, being quite the introvert.

But I knew Yuffie loved to have fun, and maybe getting her out of the house for a while would get her out of my hair, too. Maybe she could find somewhere nice to have fun, and I could hole-up in a hotel room and read the next two in a series of science fiction novels I was beginning to enjoy.

"Where should we go?"

"What about Rocket Town?"

Yuffie scrunched her face up. "You want to party with Cid? That old fart?"

I could only imagine the expletive Cid would throw Yuffie's way for the insult she'd just paid him.

"If we go anywhere else, we'd have to take the buggy."

I hated that thing. I hated driving it, I hated siting in it, I hated the sounds and the smells inside of it. We'd left it outside of the city when our odd troupe had needed to pass through the mountains in order to continue our search for Sephiroth. Though the weeds had grown tall around it, the damned thing still worked. It was parked, rather unceremoniously, in the small stretch of yard on the right side of the house.

"How about Costa del Sol? It'd be nice to get some sunshine, and a little excitement. The people in this town aren't exactly what I'd call... fun."

She had a point.

"Alright. We'll leave tomorrow, but we'll have to drive most of the day to get there, so we'll need to head out early."

Yuffie squealed, jumped up and down, and promptly bolted upstairs to pack.

I had a bad feeling, in the pit of my stomach, that this trip wasn't going to end well.

The next morning, bright and early, we piled a single suitcase each into the backseat of the buggy and began our journey. It was a slow, unwelcome drive- much of the time spent trying to navigate over rough terrain. The supposed road hadn't been worked on or cleared out since the fall of ShinRa, and damage from rainfall was evident with every pothole I was forced to navigate around.

The drive should have taken us the better part of the day. By the time nightfall, we were only three quarters of the way there. While my vision had little trouble with darkness, the glare of the headlights in front of me had only succeeded in giving me a headache. I pulled of the road, and cut the engine.

Yuffie, who had been wide awake the entire drive so far, took her headphones off and looked at me expectantly. "We're stopping?"

I shrugged. "I don't think it safe to keep driving while it's so dark out. We'll just sleep here for the night, I suppose."

She made a face, dug through a bag she'd had at her feet for most of the drive, and pulled out two sandwiches. "I'm glad I packed these, then."

It was simple peanut butter and jelly, but it tasted decent enough on the fresh bread it had been made with. After we'd had our fill, Yuffie curled up on her seat while pressing it backwards. Letting out a contented sigh, she closed her eyes.

I reached into the backseat and pulled my book away from underneath the tangled mess that was Yuffie's open suitcase. She'd torn it open hardly half an hour after we'd started our journey, and pulled out from it books and a music player; simple things to keep her mind busy – and her mouth closed. It sounded cruel, but whatever she had been listening so intently to earlier had easily saved my sanity. Yuffie was chatty by nature- could you honestly imagine what it would have been like to be stuffed in a car with her, talking non-stop, for hours on end?

It had been nearly an hour, and a good portion of my book later, before Yuffie rolled over and faced me. "I can't sleep. Talk to me."

I put my book down, and turned to her. "About what?"

She sighed, bored. "I don't know. Why aren't you trying to sleep?"

The question was one born of honest curiosity. But behind it, the reason for my body not needing as much sleep as a normal human, was dark and something I didn't enjoy bringing up.

Still, she had asked. Honesty was something I'd always favored.

"The things that possess me have changed my cell structure. I don't need as much food or sleep as humans."

Her face scrunched. "You talk like you're not human."

My chest was tight. "For the most part, I'm not.

She blinked at me, undeterred. "Not human? Like, how?"

I looked at her, unsure of what to say. "Yuffie, I honestly don't know how many things possess my body; how many things swim through my blood. To say that I'm human would be a lie. Only my body is that of a human, and what remains of my mind."

"You take everything too seriously, Valentine. What's so great about being human?"

Her statement caught me by surprise. For years, I had wished that whatever creatures had been placed inside my body would leave me be. Yuffie looked at those inside me as an attribute.

"I mean, without the things inside of you, you're normal, like everyone else. There's nothing great about being normal. No one thinks twice about you. I mean, look at you; you're faster, smarter, and stronger than anyone else I know."

As I slowly began to think about Yuffie's odd statement, the more I began to realize that while my body partially belonged to whatever creatures used it as a host, I was, in fact, gifted with all of the things Yuffie had mentioned.

And only one of the demons within me had ever conversed.

Chaos had spoken to me, directly, on two separate occasions. The first had been when I'd woken up on Hojo's lab, completely and utterly abandoned. After I'd broken down and convinced myself that the world was better off without me, it was Chaos who'd led me to the coffin in which I'd spent the last three decades.

"Sleep," was all I'd heard.

The second was when Cloud and his band of merry men had woken me from said hibernation. It was when Cloud had mentioned Sephiroth's name that something inside of me stirred.

"Go," was the only thing said inside my mind.

Yuffie sighed. "I know that you're into all of this tortured soul crap, but honestly? I think you should respect what you have inside you more. I've only seen you let Chaos out when we're in big trouble, like the one time in the crater when you, me, and Cid ran into those Tonberries. We didn't stand a chance. But you let Chaos out. He fought, saved our asses, then gave you back your body. You have a power that lets you protect other people, Vincent. How is that bad?"

I couldn't tell if I was flattered or enraged.

I went with enraged.

"Do you have any idea what would happen if I lost control of Chaos? Can you imagine the carnage that would ensue?"

Yuffie scoffed. "Have you ever let him out long enough to see what he'd do?"

I opened my mouth- and had nothing to say.

Chaos didn't seem to have a vendetta against me, the host whose body he was trapped in. There were times where I felt urges emanate from him, lending me strength to keep going, but other than the two words of advice he'd given me Chaos was still a mystery to me.

"See?" Yuffie interjected before I could formulate a reply. "You don't even know what's going on inside your body. You lock yourself up tight, convinced these creatures would hurt those around you, but you've never asked their opinions, have you? Other than Chaos, how many others have names?"

"You're far too rational, Yuffie. These are demons we are talking about."

She rolled her eyes. "No, they are creatures. If they were demons, I don't think you'd have been able to ward off all of the evil they'd spread. You locked yourself in a coffin to prevent yourself from hurting anyone else in the world, and then you traveled all over seeking to fix your mistakes. When did your supposed 'demons' try to steer you wrong, try to kill those who fought beside you?"

I turned away from her, staring out into the darkness.

For someone so young, she understood the world better than nearly anyone I'd ever met. One minute I would think her as immature and childish, and the next she'd lecture me for the way I think, and tell me everything wrong with my train of thought.

"I've lived with you for how long now, Vincent? Just over six months? When have your demons tried to hurt me? When have they even thought of it?"

I was baffled by how correct her assumptions were. "How would you know if those inside me wanted to hurt you?"

She crossed her arms. "Body language. If you'd been fighting with whatever is inside you, it would have shown. Never once when I've been in your presence have you thought of doing something you'd regret. That, and you never try to avoid my company. If you'd wanted to hurt me, Vincent, you've had endless opportunities."

Silence filled up the car.

Yuffie rolled over and curled back up in her chair, sighing in annoyance. "God, now I'll never get to sleep. Some conversational partner you are."

And just like that, her child-like attitude was back.

For the third time since he'd been injected into my body, Chaos spoke.

"Perceptive, intelligent girl."

I closed my eyes and rested the back of my head against the headrest. A peculiar feeling washed over me, and I knew nothing would be the same again.


	11. Chapter 11

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 11

We pulled into the bustling port town of Costa del Sol at sundown, having spent nearly the entire day on the road. What should have taken hardly eleven hours had easily turned into an eternity, considering the shape of the road. Yuffie, thankfully, refrained from complaining, knowing full well that her only other alternative would be the High Wind. Her stomach simply wouldn't allow it, and I was thankful for it; it wasn't in me to bother Cid or the rest of his crew so that we might hitch a ride halfway across a continent we were perfectly capable of traversing on our own.

Still, I could tell with the way she fidgeted as soon as we began nearing the city how bored she was.

Few words had been spoken between us since the night before, and I wasn't sure how completely to take it. I seemed to have upset Yuffie, but considering it had been my rather sensitive past she'd commented on without aplomb, it should have been me who was pissed off.

I still refrained from speaking too much, somewhat glad for the silence. The radio in the buggy refused to pick up any kind of signal, so my wish of decent music – if any at all – had been dashed. That only added to the odd silence that stretched between us when the batteries in Yuffie's music player had run dry.

People were already lined up in the streets – vendors and tourists alike – ready for the winter solstice celebration. We'd missed the display of goods and good cheer today, but I could tell Yuffie was still itching to have a good time.

I found myself glad over the prospect of her not quite being old enough to drink. That would have been a headache waiting to happen, literally and figuratively speaking.

"I hope we can still get a hotel room." Yuffie was practically bouncing up and down in her seat. Her smiled made me relax a little; she might have been mad at me, but at least now it was less so.

"I'm sure we can find something to accommodate us."

We parked the buggy and took our bags from the backseat, quickly making our way to the inn.

Smiling brightly, the inn keeper greeted us. "Need a room?"

Yuffie was off, starring at the assortment of rare and precious things that littered the shelves of the inn front. Her eyes, wide with excitement, reminded me that I needed to deter he from playing pickpocket on our little vacation.

"Come," I bade her, after I'd paid the keeper his fare for the few nights we'd be staying.

Grabbing her bag, Yuffie followed me up the stairs.

"Need I remind you that nothing from this town that you do not purchase is to go into your pockets?"

She made an offended sound.

"I'm a ninja, Valentine; not a thief."

"I'm sure Cloud would beg to differ. Dare I remind you of the fun we had the first time we visited Wutai with you in tow?

"Oh, whatever. You're just pissed off because you didn't notice your materia was gone before it was too late, making me better at stealth."

I cleared my throat. "I'm serious. I'm taking you home if I so much as think you stole something, understand?"

"What are you; my keeper? I'll be good, I swear. Ninja's honor, and all that fun stuff."

Refusing to argue further, hoping that she'd understood the stress I'd put on her being good while we were here, I turned the key to the room and clicked the light on.

"Oh, why, Vincent- you devilish thing you! Only one bed? My, my; you had high hopes for this weekend, what with-"

"I told you in the car, Yuffie," I interjected her mockery of me. "I don't need sleep like a normal human. You'll take the bed, and I'll simply use the couch and read while you sleep. Besides; we save money only renting a room with one bed, versus a room with two. I'm not made of money, you know."

She still was smiling slyly when I turned around to face her, and I dismissed her silly attitude and notions with a roll of my eyes.

"Most of the shops are closing, but you're welcome to go out and catch what you can while you still have time."

She stretched her arms out, above her head. "Sitting in that dumb car made my back hurt. I'm gonna get some sleep, but I'll be up bright and early, don't you worry!" She skipped off to the bathroom, pajamas in one hand, toothbrush in the other.

I slumped down onto the couch. As I pulled my book out of my bag, I pondered just what I'd managed to get myself into.

When Yuffie woke up – a little less bright, and quite later than she'd informed me the night before – she dressed and promised to be back before midnight.

I shrugged it off, slightly uncaring. I knew full well, from the punch I'd received when she had first hunted me down after our adventure in the crater, that she was more than capable to fend for herself. She hadn't asked me for money, so I assumed she'd brought some of her own. Assumed, however, could also be translated as 'hoped to dear, great Leviathan', considering she was, at least in the presence of good materia, a klepto.

The last thing I wanted to do was get her ass out of trouble simply because at the age of seventeen she'd failed to grasp the concept of keeping one's hands to themselves.

It was well into the evening, just as the sun was setting, before I moved myself from my position on the couch and made my way into town, hoping there was at least one stall with decent Wutain cuisine. The winter solstice celebration was one that the nearly every culture on Gaia held as dear, as it ushered in a new year. It's when people prayed to their gods, be they of every conceivable religion, for good fortune and health. Or, if you weren't into the religious aspect of the ceremonies, it was a great excuse to get shit-faced drunk.

Me? I just wanted decent Wutai egg flower soup.

I spotted her haunched over a barstool set up outside a food vendor's cart.

"Man, that's the best shit I've tasted I all damn day!"

I stood behind her, watching and waiting.

"I mean it. You should, like, sell it or something."

Oh, summons and angels; she was drunk.

Somehow, I knew that because I had thought of it – because I had been thankful that she was too young to drink, legally – she was bound to get plastered.

"Yuffie." My voice wasn't questioning; it was deep and irritated.

She spun around, nearly taking me down with her; she'd tripped on her wooden sandal and had pushed her face, less than delicately, into my chest.

Her eyes grew wide when she finally looked up at me. Then, she smiled.

"Hey, Vinnie! What's up?"

Vinnie? Oh, shoot me now.

No, scratch that; shoot her.

I looked over her head and gave the food vendor an apologetic look. "Two bowls of egg flower soup, and two hot teas to go, please."

He gave us a strange look, gazing first at my underage and very drunk companion, then up to me.

I bet he thought I was a vampire, too. That seemed to be everyone's favorite thing for me to be. I shoved at him a handful of gil that was more than sufficient, and put my hand on Yuffie's shoulder as I waited for our food.

"You're coming back to the inn, Yuffie."

She made a sour, sad face at me. "But Vinnie- I was just telling this guy that his food is some kind of great. He let me try some fried eel, and damn was it yummers!"

She was making up words now. Wonderful.

I patted her on the head.

"It's almost dark out, Yuffie. You said you'd come back with me, remember?"

Her face fell blank, as if she really was trying to remember. "Did I?"

Of course she didn't.

"Of course you did."

"All right. You're a good man, coming to find me like this."

The vendor handed me a bag with our food inside, and I smiled at him, grudgingly. "And you're a bad girl, getting drunk like this."

She sighed as I took her elbow, leading her back through the throng of people that decorated the city streets. "I know. I was only gonna drink one. But they were so yummy, I couldn't stop."

"I'm sure they were. Now you know better."

She clutched her stomach. "Or at least I will. Man, I feel like I'm gonna barf."

I hurried her up the stairs of the inn, hoping her stomach could keep down the alcoholic cacophony that was brewing within until we could get near a toilet.

She made it, but not by much.

I knew she didn't have to worry about herself. She was a martial artist, after all. But, I hadn't thought her sweet tooth would have been her downfall.

Resigned, knowing that scolding her while she was already having an intense argument with her stomach (and losing horribly) wasn't the best course of action, I leaned against the bathroom sink and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

When she was finished, I led her to bed and made her choke down a few aspirin. She was not going to be happy when she woke up, and I was going to be even less happy than she, considering I was going to have to deal with her hangover and the mess of grumpy attitude that I was certain would accompany. At least the medicine would dull her headache and help her sleep for a while.

I finished my book that night, unsatisfied. Happy endings always bothered me, I suppose because I mostly didn't believe in them. The hero wins at the end, and no one gets hurt?

Are you kidding me?

I knew a hero. Hell, I'd fought along side him. I'd seen the hurt in his eyes when we lost one of our own along the way; I'd felt it myself. None of us would be normal, or at least the way we used to be, ever again.

Even Yuffie had changed drastically since the first time I'd met her. She covered her hurt with sarcasm, and hid her tears behind a cheeky grin. Still childish though she may be, she'd done the most growing up along our journey. She'd had to; I don't think her mind could have taken the depth of the world, death, and the horrors that populate the planet had she not.

Speak of the devil.

She stirred, lifting a hand to her forehead and groaning.

"I feel like I've been run over by a heard of Chocobos."

"You might as well have been, with the amount of alcohol I'm sure you consumed last night."

"Hey, that wasn't my fault. The guy at the bar told me I was cute. I had to take the drink he bought me; it's an insult, otherwise."

"Insult or not, you're lucky I found you when I did. You shouldn't buckle just because a man commented on your looks."

"Oh, plug it, Valentine. It's hard for me to gain any attention at all, let alone enough for someone to throw me a compliment and mean it. I took the drink because he meant it when he called me cute. I took the second and third one because they tasted damn good."

I was growing impatient. "You took a drink because a man complimented you?"

She sighed. "I don't get nice comments about my looks very often."

"Yuffie, you can't-"

"Can you just tell me that you're disappointed in me and get it over with? You're not my father; I don't have to explain myself to you. Yes, thank you for bringing me back last night. No, I'm not ashamed for having fun and trying to feel good about myself."

I bit my lip, keeping myself from snapping at her.

If compliments she wanted, she needed to start off by changing her attitude. Still, it seemed that there was some minor self-esteem issue I shouldn't have brought up. Perhaps it would be best to change the subject.

"I'm not letting you out of my sight for the rest of the trip, understand?"

"Yes, dad." Her voice was sarcastic and harsh.

"Go back to sleep."

She rolled over and gave me the cold shoulder. At least she had done as I'd told her. Eventually, I heard her breathing even out. The steady rise and fall of her chest let me know she was already back in dreamland.

It was ten in the morning when I took one of the containers of egg flower soup from the fridge. The hot tea I was somewhat looking forward to had turned stone cold, but it was better than drinking nothing. I sat on the bed next to Yuffie, nudging her with my elbow.

"You need food," I informed the groggy being that gazed up at me from the mess of blankets.

She sat up, slowly, and took the container of soup from me with both hands. There were bags under her eyes, and I'm sure she had a headache, but she'd slept most of her hangover out. It was, as awful as it sounded, a good thing she'd thrown up the night before. In doing so, she'd expelled a large amount of alcohol from her system, thus purging her body of it.

When he was finished sipping her soup, without complaining that it was cold even once, she handed me back the empty cup and sighed, dejected.

"I'm sorry."

I looked down at her, still slightly disappointed in her choices. "You could have really been hurt, Yuffie. Or worse; who is to say what those boys who got you drunk were really after."

She grimaced. "I know. I'm sorry."

"I don't want to see you that drunk again."

She nodded, taking the cold tea from me and drinking it slowly.

"Can we go out tonight?"

"Interested in seeing the firework display?"

She shuffled a little, sipping down more cold tea. "Yeah. Fireworks at the solstice are huge in Wutai. It's one of the few things I actually miss."

I was silent a moment, contemplating. She was asking me if I'd accompany her, which, for Yuffie, was quite the invitation. Even while living with me, she mostly kept to herself, either in her room or doing whatever the hell she wanted. True, she was a decent companion while we were in the same room – or at least a decent percentage of the time – and she held her own on the battlefield, but, for the most part, Yuffie was much like me; a bit of a loner.

"We can go out, but you won't leave my side."

I wasn't her father, and I wasn't about to punish her with some silly grounding bullshit, but I figured forcing her to stay in my company through the night would annoy her and put my mind to rest.

"Alright."

I was pleased she wasn't going to argue with me.

We spent the morning watching basic cable in the hotel room, Yuffie bundled up and happy that there was something to entertain her and I pleased to switch between reading my book and catching glimpses of whatever was on TV. I was somewhat pleased, though I don't think I'd ever admit it out loud, that Yuffie picked Discovery World over whatever useless sitcoms that polluted the other channels. We spent a good hour engrossed in a documentary that featured the brand new, state of the art hospital that had just opened up in Mideel. One of the head doctors was a man named Rej, who kept reiterating what a magnificent place it was. Despite his flattery, I didn't suspect him of being the kind of man that used it to up his paycheck.

Yuffie showered after the credits had rolled, and I was relieved to see her up and walking around. Though I was rather sure she still harbored some level of headache, she wasn't one to let something as trivial as pain stop her from having fun; that's simply how she was.

She came out in a traditional Wutain kimono, tough her skirt was cut to her knees, and did a little twirl for me. The cloth was the same color as her eyes. "How do I look?"

It took me a moment to formulate a reply to her question, because, as luck would have it, seeing Yuffie in something other than tank tops and jeans, or shorts of the weather permitted it, was enough to cause me to stop and actually think about it.

She looked like a young woman, strong willed and intelligent; unlike the stubborn, selfish deviant I'd come accustomed to.

"You look nice." It was lame reply, but a decent one. She smiled at me and pulled up her tabi socks to the middle of her calves, easily slipping on her wooden sandals as well.

"No traditional dress for you? Where are you from, anyway?"

Again with her innocent questions I lacked happy answers for.

"My mother was Wutain, but died was I was younger. My father and I didn't get along well. Tradition doesn't spread far in a somewhat broken home."

Yuffie scrunched her face. "You are so depressing, you know that?"

I shrugged. "You asked, I answered; what else do you want from me?"

She loosened her face, sighing. "Not to be so depressed all the time. You're worse than Cloud sometimes, you know that?"

I could sense her humor, and her wish to lighten the mood. "There are no longstanding traditions in my family. Is that better?"

"It'll do, I guess."

She adjusted the obi that was wound tight around her tiny waist and tucked her coin purse into her sleeve. "Alright, let's go have some fun!"

Despite myself, I had fun. Not a lot, but enough for the trip to be memorable without having only a single drunken escapade to remember it by. Yuffie, leading the way the entire time, forced foreign foods down my throat from the different vendors, and borrowed gil from me to play the carnival games set up along the roads. She managed to win a little black chocobo plushie from the ring-toss game, which she held over her head in triumph as if she'd slain the Midgar Zolom herself.

We sat on the beach, watching the fireworks at midnight, as we shared a cherry-flavored bowl of shaved ice.

Yuffie reached over, chocobo plush in hand, and had the little thing give me a kiss on the cheek. She accompanied with a sweet kiss sound. "For all the shit I give you, you're a nice guy, Valentine. Boco and I mean it."

And it hit me.

I'd never been able to relax so willingly with someone in my company before. With Yuffie, my defenses were down and my wit, unavoidably, was up. Even with Lucre-

No. Those times were gone. I wasn't going to let my past be my ruler. What happened had happened and, and even though I didn't much believe in them, we had managed a somewhat decent happily ever after. We all missed Aerith, but we all would move on. The planet would turn, the sun would rise anew, and, despite our griefs, the days pass. Little victories, no matter how little they really are, still deserved to be counted.

The cosmos don't stop when we do. Even if our lives change the world around us, time never stops to mourn.

I looked at Yuffie, and realized that despite her selfishness; her childishness; her dry sarcasm and made up words; her kleptomania; she was the only reason I hadn't killed myself all those months ago.

And I started to admire her for it, with what little warmth my heart had left.

I smiled, mostly to myself, and whispered into the night. "You're not so bad yourself."

Under the din of the fireworks, I doubt she heard me.


	12. Chapter 12

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 12

Even after all of the time I've spent in her company, Yuffie Kisaragi remains an enigma.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not talking mysteries of life or anything so significant.

I've simply found that as soon as I think I know her, as soon as I believe I've figured part of her out, she does or says something that throws me completely off balance.

I used to think of myself as a practical man; a man who puts thoughts behind actions, and meaning behind words. Now, I find myself doing impractical things for impractical reasons, just to please the young woman who I share a living space with.

Though, I have little right to complain considering that if I truly wanted out I could excuse myself from my predicament permanently by simply leaving in the middle of the night.

Then again, I tried that once. It landed me a punch in th face.

With a heavy heart I openly admit that the main reason I believe Yuffie an enigma was simply how completely different she was from what was familiar to me in women. She was, in short, an absolute opposite of Lucrecia.

Comparing the two, I realized, was like comparing apples to chocobos; they were simply never meant to be compared to one another.

Sure, they had similar defining qualities, like their kindness – though it was harder to find in Yuffie than it had been in Lucrecia – but, overall, they were beings that exhibited completely different behavioral and attitude patterns. Where Lucrecia had been calm, collected, patient and wise, Yuffie was boisterous, overwhelming, restless and, more often than not, callous.

And, as it turned out, she and I were just what the other needed.

Near midsummer, Yuffie had made a friend. He was a young man by the name of Rafe, and his family owned the general store that had only opened a few months before. He was genuine and kind, though slightly sarcastic, and he and Yuffie got along well enough that their sharing company allowed me a little silences every now and again.

It was almost her birthday, hardly a week before, and she came home with red eyes and of sore temperament.

I followed her to her room, concerned, and she told me to mind my own business and leave her some space. Then, she promptly shut her bedroom door in my face.

Rather put off, I left her to her own the rest of the night.

She emerged at nearly two o'clock in the morning, looking sheepish and utterly disheveled. Her eyes were puffy, and her nose was red.

"I'm sorry I was such a bitch earlier," she hiccuped.

"Care to share what happened?"

Yuffie folded her arms across her chest, biting her lip.

"I was dumped."

I raised an eyebrow, unaware that she had actually been dating Rafe. Sighing, I stood up and walked to her. She looked so small and fragile when she was upset. I put a hand on her shoulder.

"Care for some hot chocolate? I was about to fix myself some."

The surprise on her face was more than apparent. I knew that when she had opened up to me and apologized she hadn't been looking for pity. Yuffie wasn't like that. She just wanted someone to talk to.

If there was one thing I'd learned about her while in her company, it was that she didn't want pity and sympathy. She simply wants to talk, and to have someone listen to her, even if they don't say anything in reply.

Even so, I'm sure she'd been expecting a lecture from me.

She would be eighteen in a few days time; who was I to lecture her any longer? Perhaps if she did something truly stupid I might speak up.

But heartbreak is a part of life, and you never understand how to accept it until it's kicked you in the face with a spiked boot and you're forced to keep going because that's just how messed up the world is.

She hiccuped. "Yeah. That sounds good."

I made it the way she preferred, with whole milk warmed on the stove and an extra spoonful of the chalky cocoa powder. Four small marshmallows swam in the warm brew; her supposed lucky number.

"Have you thought about what you might like for your birthday?"

She looked up at me with a saddened expression. "Vincent, when is your birthday?"

I blinked in surprise. "The thirteenth of October."

"We didn't celebrate. I'm sorry."

She looked as though she was going to cry.

I held up a hand, trying to dismiss her anxiety. "Yuffie, my birthday is unimportant. If I had wanted a party, I would have said something."

"But birthdays are special. Everyone should feel special on their birthday."

I smiled at her, gently. "Please, Yuffie- don't cry. If you're so bothered by my lack of birthday, how about we celebrate both of our birthdays on the same day? You made yourself a cake last years, but how about we go to the store and get a nice cake for the both of us?"

She blinked at me, and at first I thought she was unmoved.

"Since I'll be turning 18, am I allowed some alcohol?"

I smirked, trying to bring humor into the conversation. "I'm not so sure. Remembered what happened last time you and alcohol mixed?" I knew she wasn't crying for lack of celebration; she was still upset over being dumped, and, as sad as it sounded, I didn't blame her. Hearts are fickle things.

That brought a smile to her face, albeit a small one. "I promise to be good. I'll only have a little. Please?"

I pretended to mull the idea over. "I suppose we could get a little, but only if I get to pick."

She grinned, her mood having lifted somewhat. "If you pick, you have to pay."

"Fair enough."

She leaned against the door frame, sighing heavily. Her intake of breath was shaken, and I knew she was both emotionally and mentally drained.

I made a motion with my head, directing her toward the stairs. "You should go get some sleep. We can talk in the morning."

She acquiesced, without so much as a second thought. I retreated to my room for the remainder of the night.

It was two days later, I was in the general store purchasing something that wouldn't tank Yuffie in less than two drinks. I promised her alcohol. I didn't, however, promise her the alcohol's proof. I made sure to give Rafe a good long glare before I left. The look on his face was akin to someone who had just watched their entire lives flash before their eyes.

For the first time I was thankful nearly half of the townsfolk thought me to be some dark, evil creature of the night. Rafe wouldn't be sleeping peacefully for many moons to come.

Sure, it was cruel of me.

Did it make me feel better knowing that I had messed with him after he'd dumped Yuffie?

You bet.

I arrived home with Yuffie's requested booze and she squealed happily when she saw what I carried, despite the proof. She didn't seem to mind, which meant that I wasn't going to get my ass chewed. Win-win situation.

It was well into the night, the bottles of alcohol were nearly empty, and we lay, side by side, on the floor, our heads near one another, our feet facing opposite directions.

"And you know what?" Her words weren't slurred, but it appeared she had a lower tolerance for alcohol than I'd previously thought.

"No. What?"

"I asked for a chocobo, and I got the damn chocobo. I was, like, nine, and my dad got me a pet chocobo for my birthday. That was some messed up shit. I loved that dopey bird. I almost took him with me when I ran away. I left him, though, because I knew how much grandma loved him, too."

"That was kind of you." I took another sip from the bottle in my hand, despite its near emptiness.

She rolled over, looking me right in the eyes, propping herself up with her elbows. "You know, I can't tell stuff like this to anyone else. No one else gets me like you do, Vincent. Everyone tells me I had it easy, and for the most part, they're right. I did have it easy. But what else can I compare it to? I mean, sure, those were some great times, but as soon as mom died and Shinra invaded, my entire world went down the shitter."

She took the bottle from my hand and gulped the rest of the alcohol down, smacking her lips theatrically.

"You. You had it bad, I can tell. Even though you won't tell me crap about your past, I know you had it bad. But you're like me. Not everything was bad at first. Then it just punched you in the gut and gave you the finger as it ran the hell away, right?"

I was tired, and heavily buzzed from drinking so much. "I did have it bad. Not at first, you're right."

"I'm sorry."

Rolling over, I propped myself up on my elbow and faced her. "It's late. We should go to bed."

She looked around the room, at the food wrappers and dirty dishes on the coffee table. "What about our mess?"

"We can deal with it in the morning. I don't care right now."

"Vincent Valentine; it seems you pull that stick out of your ass when you've had a few drinks. Maybe we should buy alcohol more often?"

I stood and reached my hand out to help her up. "Not likely. This was a one-time thing."

"What about next year?"

I grimaced as I stood, knowing there was no way to back out of the deal I had apparently made. Birthdays equal alcohol. "Next year, you can pay."

She groaned, rolling onto her back and dramatically threw her wrist to her forehead. I held a hand out to her, offering her help up.

"Carry me."

I looked down at her and raised an eyebrow. "Carry you?"

"Is there an echo in here?"

Was I really going to argue with a slightly intoxicated Yuffie? Honestly, I was too tired to care.

So, swallowing my pride, I bent down and scooped her up, carrying her, bridal style, to the stairs.

That's when everything went downhill.

She reached up and began to tear at the cloth I used to hide my eyes and keep the hair from my face. "What are you doing?" I vocally protested, unable to do anything considering I needed both hands to hold her.

"I'm taking this stupid thing off. Your eyes are such a cool color, and your hair looks like shit with this thing is all wrapped up around it."

The top stair is where I met my downfall, quite literally.

It was true that I had the blood of many creatures flowing through my veins, and it was true that I had faster reflexes than the average human because of it. It was also a slightly less known truth that I, on occasion, could trip over my own two feet.

My occasional clumsiness mixed with the fact that my hair wrap was completely blocking out my vision thanks to Yuffie, it was no wonder that I fell when my foot caught the top stair.

Despite my fast reflexes, I didn't have enough time to place a foot out in order to stop from falling, but I was at least able to turn on the way down, meaning that I landed on my back, elbows out to support me, while Yuffie landed, without grace, on my stomach.

I groaned from the discomfort. It hadn't hurt too terribly, but it was still enough to earn a wince out of me. When I looked up, Yuffie was giggling.

"That was bad, even for you."

"I didn't manage to fall on you, did I? Besides; if you hadn't been messing around in the first place I wouldn't have fallen. I couldn't see because of you."

She shrugged, as if it were nothing of importance. Instead, she leaned toward me and, pulling my hair back, tied it in a low ponytail at the base of my neck, keeping it place with the wrap she'd only just finished undoing.

"There! All better!"

When she reached out her hand to tuck a few stray strands of hair behind my ear, everything stopped in my world.

I always knew she was a lady. But when, honestly, had she become a woman? Her skin was smooth and warm, her eyes cheery and bright, her smile gleeful and mischievous.

She was somehow... different.

I must have been wearing my emotions on my face, plain as day, because I watched as Yuffie's face slowly changed as she read the look I knew was present on mine.

She slowly leaned in...

And kissed me, full on the lips.

It was gentle, tentative, yet bold, as if she were both frightened and sure of herself at the same time.

At first, I didn't know what to do. It had been a long time since I'd been with a woman... Yuffie was still so young, so fragile, so...

Innocent.

But I couldn't help myself.

She pulled back when I didn't respond, her face already completely red from embarrassment.

"Vincent, I'm-"

I didn't know what I was doing. Hell, I hadn't realized I was doing it until it was too late.

I reached my right hand up, letting it slide through her short hair, and placed it on the back of her head. Gently, I pulled her toward me.

Here eyes grew wide before they slowly drifted close, her face coming closer to mine until there was no space between as our lips met again.

It was novel, kissing a woman I wasn't completely infatuated with. Refreshing, uplifting, pleasant...

It was greedy, selfish, and uncaring of me, but I couldn't help it; I wanted more.

I pushed against her, pulling my lips away only to press them against hers again and again. Sitting up, cradling her in my lap, I pulled her close and wrapped my arms around her.

Her arms wove around my neck in return, lying lazily on my shoulders while her fingers traced unrecognizable patterns in my back.

I stood before I knew what I was doing. Her lithe legs wrapped around my waist as she held onto me. Deep down, something feral in me wanted to keep going. Most of me, in fact, would have been contented to continue, but I knew that she was too young, too innocent, too new to love and the dangers it possessed.

The only love I'd ever known had destroyed me.

What, then, was left of me to lose?

I'd walked into her room and sat her on the bed, both of my arms resting on either side of her. I took a deep breath, trying to distract myself. Her deft fingers had taken my hair tie out – the one that had started this mess in the first place, no less – and her touch was gentle, pleading.

She was scared, but intrigued. I could feel her pulse in her wrist as I pulled her hand away.

Her eyes, both curious and hurt that I'd stopped her, caught me.

I hadn't said a word.

But the moment I felt my face change, I knew it was too late. She had seen the most basic of human emotions cross my face.

For the first time since my change, I let myself wear my heart on my face.

Her eyes fell. She folded her hands into her lap and sighed.

I reached down, pushing the hair from her eyes, and kissed her forehead before I left the room.

I was terrified.

Yuffie had seen me in my most basic, vulnerable state, and she's simply let it go. She knew there was nothing she could have said, could have done, so she let me to myself.

It was the kindest thing anyone had ever done for me.


	13. Chapter 13

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 13

There is an old saying that states 'you don't choose to fall in love,' and whatever bastard said it deserved the cold death that awaited him at the end of his life because he was masterfully and painfully correct.

I never chose to fall in love. I didn't wake up one morning, pull myself out of bed, to wholly and without a second thought decide that I would fall in love, and that Yuffie was the one waiting for me at the end of the rainbow.

Life doesn't happen like that. It never happens like that. Happy endings are few and far between, if ever.

Yet I found that for the most part, I was never more at ease with myself – never before feeling more like a man instead of a monster – than when I was with her.

She's the way life should be lived; anyway you damn well please.

And, as I began to understand, she was exactly what I'd needed all along.

The morning after we'd kissed, the mood was tight. I'd retreated to my bedroom after I'd left hers, locking myself in the bathroom until the early hours of the morning. I'd showered, and then sat on the toilet draped in nothing but a towel until dawn. Then, when my brain had run itself ragged inside of my head, I'd dressed and forced myself back into my daily routine.

I didn't wrap my hair or cover my eyes.

I went downstairs and began breakfast, something I'd become accustomed to for the nearing two years I'd lived in the manor with Yuffie. Bacon, scrambled eggs, pancakes; I cooked anything and everything I could, willing my hands to occupy themselves in order to distract my mind from the inner turmoil I wasn't able to cope with.

She'd been so forgiving when I'd stopped her; so understanding when she realized I hadn't know what I wanted.

I knew she was in the kitchen, despite her not having made a sound when she entered. She sat on the barstool in front of the breakfast nook, and I felt her eyes watching my back as I finished slicing the fruit.

"Morning."

What else was I supposed to say?

"Morning."

She was taking the awkwardness in stride.

"So, why'd you do it?"

I faltered and nearly cut my finger. Turns out she wasn't taking it quite as I'd first thought.

It was a long while before I spoke. She sat in silence, patient, waiting for my reply.

"Because I wanted to."

I finished cutting the rind from the cantaloupe and scooped it into a bowl, placing it on the counter top in front of her.

"Okay."

That was it. That was all that was spoken between us for the rest of the meal. That was all she needed to hear from me.

Here I was, horrified I'd done something perverse, wondering if I was even ready to open up to another woman again and Yuffie... Yuffie was just worried I hadn't meant it. She knew I was scared, but she was only fretting over the idea of me not having meant to kiss her.

We ate our breakfast in silence, and when we'd finished I felt better than I had in a long while. We put the rest of the fruit in little plastic tubs, stored them in the fridge, and went our separate ways for the remainder of the daylight hours.

On a whim, I decided to start a fire in one of the drawing rooms on the west side of the mansion when night fell. The particular room in question had grown on me, and I had been using the empty shelves that lined the walls as my own personal library. The shopkeep in town had started stocking more books, in which I presumed he did mostly for me and the fact that I bought at least two a week. Yuffie speculated that I was single handedly keeping the shop from going under.

What? I enjoy reading. What else was there to do?

It was nearly midnight when I heard her knock on the door.

"Come in," I answered, not looking up from my book.

"Hey." She stood near the door, as if waiting for me to give her more direction. I folded the corner of the page I'd been reading, and focused my attention on her.

The look on her face betrayed her emotions- guilt, curiosity, unease.

"Something you need?" I tried to keep my voice low, letting her know that while she'd interrupted my reading she wasn't bothering me.

"Yeah." Her voice was small, a characteristic not usually associated with her, and she was avoiding my gaze.

I reached over, placing my book down on the floor, and patted the seat cushion next to me.

She obeyed, still not looking into my eyes. She sighed, looking at the fireplace. It was obvious she was trying to gather herself, to find the right words, but that logic was escaping her.

"When I asked you this morning why you kissed me..." Yuffie's voice trailed off.

"I answered you truthfully."

Biting her bottom lip, Yuffie turned her gaze to her hands. "I don't pretend to understand you. I really don't. Sometimes I think I've got you down, but I... I guess I just want to know why you stopped, why you pushed me away, in your own words."

"What, then, is your speculation?"

Turning, her eyes scrutinizing as if she believed I was mocking her, she shrugged. "I don't think you'd like it."

"Try me."

"I'm telling you; you won't like it."

"Tell me what you think, Yuffie."

"I think you've got a self-righteous stick up your ass. I think you don't like letting yourself have something you want, or something that makes you feel good, because you're still hung up over your dead girlfriend and all of this 'penance' bullshit. I think you're pretending to be level-headed around me, but that you still feel the same way you did when I first punched you in the face two years ago. I think you can't let yourself go, let yourself be happy, because you're too worried you're going to fuck it up again. I think you're scared shitless over letting something new into your life. I think that if I were to leave, you'd end up killing yourself, just like you had planned. That's what I think."

I sighed deeply, not realizing how much I upset her.

"You're right. I didn't like it."

"Told you."

"But that doesn't mean that you're wrong."

She stilled and closed her eyes, her only movement the steady expansion and compression of her chest as she breathed.

"You're right. I do, as you put it, have a stick up my ass. I lost myself, my humanity and almost my life, to the last woman I trusted with my heart. Can you really blame me for being the way I am? You are the only thing tying me to this world, Yuffie, and for the first time in nearly thirty years I'm scared to die. That doesn't mean I don't want to, it just means that my life has a little meaning. Even if that meaning is making breakfast for us everyday. You count on me. That's enough for me to stick around."

He mouth quirked up in a fraction of a smile. "First time in thirty years? You're older than you look, that's for sure."

"I'm nearly sixty, Yuffie."

"What would you do if I left?"

It was a shocker. I hadn't expected her to ask a question like that.

"I don't know, Yuffie. I really don't know."

Her bottom lip trembled. "Would you kill yourself?"

The silence that passed between us was morbid and dank.

"Other than you, what else am I living for? I've seen Cloud and the others a handful of times since we escaped the crater. I spend my days with you, holed up in this musty house, reading and napping."

Her dejected sigh made me ache. Yet, I refused to lie to her.

"Take it however you will, Yuffie. You are my reason to live."

I watched her face, trying to gauge her reaction by it. Her bottom lip quivered, and I knew she was going to cry.

Before she let the tears fall, however, she leaned over and kissed my forehead, just as I had done the night before.

"Goodnight, Vincent." Her voice was flat as she stood and left the room.

I was too annoyed with myself to finish reading my book. My head ached as though it had been hit with something heavy, and my stomach was twisted into knots that made me think I was going to vomit.

Standing, I doused the fire and left the room, retreating to my own bedroom. On the way, however, I stopped outside Yuffie's door. I raised my hand, poised to knock, and stopped myself. Nothing I could say would make this better. Either we'd wait it out, or she'd punch me again.

I heard the gentle rustle of fabric behind the door. I heard her footsteps, and the occasional hiccup that signaled an end to her tears.

Once in my bedroom, I forced my body to sleep.

When I woke up, the house was silent.

I lay in bed for hours, listening to the quiet of the house, wondering what I'd gotten myself into.

All it had taken was a kiss...

I dressed, and, like I'd done for nearly everyday for the past two years, I descended the stairs and prepared to make breakfast. When I opened the fridge, however, I noticed that several containers of fruit were missing.

Dumbstruck, I closed the door and walked back upstairs. Pausing outside of Yuffie's bedroom door, I knocked too loud purposely and knew that I waited in vain. After a moment, I opened the door.

Things were missing. Subtle things; a hairbrush from the nightstand, the little black chocobo plushie she'd won on our excursion to Costal del Sol the winter before...

And on her neatly made bed sat a folded origami crane.

I unfolded and read it with shaking hands.

'I shouldn't have butt into your life. I shouldn't have stopped you from doing what you felt you had to. I shouldn't have forced my company on you for the past two years.

I shouldn't have kissed you.

But most of all, and it hurts the worst, I shouldn't have let you kiss me back.'

I sat down on her bed, realizing with cold clarity, that I'd chased her off because I couldn't open myself up. I curled up and simply let myself grow stagnant. My body was numb; my mind was numb. I cursed myself over and over for my blatant stupidity.

Why couldn't I change?

It was three days later when my phone rang. I knew it would.

"Hello?"

"Vincent, we need to talk."

Tifa. Shit. I was sure to get a new asshole ripped.

I stayed silent, letting her lead the conversation.

"What happened?" She sounded more anxious than angry.

"Nothing."

"Nothing? I find that hard to swallow, Valentine. We got a call from Cid last night, telling us that he was dropping Yuffie off as she'd just randomly showed up on his doorstep asking for a ride, and as soon as she got here all she did was mope. She's up in her room, pissed off and tired and won't even respond when Cid goads her. What the hell did you do to her?"

"Absolutely nothing, Tifa, and that's the problem."

"What?"

It was mine and Yuffie's business. No one else's.

"Tifa, I need something from you."

"Vincent, I-"

"Please, Tifa."

"... What?"

"Tell her... Tell her that if she ever wants to come home, I'll be here."

"Vincent, what the hell kind of favor is that? You need to-"

"Just give her the message, Tifa. Goodbye."


	14. Chapter 14

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 14

It was the most lonesome three months of my life. I didn't realize how much Yuffie had meant to me until she had left. The house felt empty; my world felt empty. I ate mostly out of necessity. On several occasions I hit up hard liquor and blasted classical music (edgy, I know) as loud as my eardrums could stand. No one in the town ever said anything. No one ever would, either; the monster had lost his lady, and no one within the city limits gave much of a damn.

I didn't blame them. I wasn't prone to giving much of a damn once I had a few shots in me, either.

The worst part, however, wasn't that Yuffie was gone.

I'd grieved over Lucretia for years. But the difference was that Lucretia was dead.

Yuffie was alive, well, and living only a continent away.

And here I was, sipping vodka and listening to piano music until I passed out.

Pathetic.

But, that's what I was. There was little use hiding the fact. The first woman I'd given my heart to had turned on me for the sake of science. I'd killed her son, the son that could have been mine had I simply put my foot down in the first place. And now Yuffie...

I couldn't even open up enough in the first place; she'd shut me down because I was too damn scared to try.

Winter came and went. I read my books, never really enjoying them as I once had.

Late into February I received a call from Tifa.

"We're having a party, and you're invited." No hello, just an announcement when I picked up the receiver.

"Tifa, my apologies, but I'm not really in the mood for a party."

A long pause. "It's more of a memorial, really. It's been nearly three years since meteor and the defeat of Sephiroth, since we lost Aerith. This is about all of us. Please say you'll be here?"

I closed my eyes, knowing that I couldn't say no.

"Very well. I'll come."

"I'll send word to Cid. He'll be by to pick you up later in the morning."

I packed a single bag with a few changes of clothes and two of my of my books.

True to Tifa's word, Cid was waiting for me outside of the town shortly after dawn.

His face was grim. I knew he wanted to ask me about Yuffie showing up on his doorstep three months ago and asking for a ride. I didn't blame him. He was, however, an honest and somewhat private man, and left me to myself.

I thanked him for the ride and climbed aboard the Highwind.

We arrived in Kalm after dark, with Tifa and Cloud to greet us at the door. Hugs and handshakes were exchanged, with Reeve, Red, and Barrett meeting us inside.

The thundering of feet down stairs caused everyone to look up. Marlene, with Yuffie close behind her, tumbled down the stairs, laughing and smiling.

I felt my heart begin to hammer in my chest.

Shiva, I was acting like a lovestruck teenager.

Yuffie, picking up Marlene and slinging the young girl over her shoulder, smiled. She didn't look in my direction at all. "I've got to go teach this monkey a lesson!"

Marlene squealed in delight and she tried to kick her way free of Yuffie's grasp. They trounced back up the stairs, making just as much noise as they had coming down.

"Everyone off to bed- we've got lots of fun to have tomorrow, and I want everyone to be rested!" Tifa's word was final, and no one argued. Instead, we let ourselves be shown to our own rooms.

Mine was last Tifa opened the door, turned, and patted my upper arm.

"It's good to see you."

She walked back down the hallway, disappearing down the stairs.

I heard a doorknob click, and I turned to come face to face with Yuffie.

It was awkward, to say the least.

"Hi." I could tell it was as uncomfortable for her to say it as it was for me to hear it. I was most likely the last person on earth she wanted to see.

I looked her in the eyes, sighed, and nodded my head once. I'd been down that road- I'd had my chance. I'd turned my back on her, and let her slip away from me.

There was too much out there left for her, anyway. She still had a life that needed to be lived to its fullest.

My sleep was fitful that night. I'd spent so much time alone, wallowing in self-pity, that sleeping in a house filled with people made my skin crawl. I could hear the snores, sense the breathing.

I wrapped a pillow around my head and forced my body to relax and allow sleep to overcome me.

It was late afternoon when I'd woken up. When I ventured downstairs, I inquired as to why no one had woken me. Tifa shrugged, and stated that she simply didn't want to bother me.

They were all drunk my nine that night. Songs were sung – badly, at that – and bottle after bottle of alcohol was emptied.

We drank to remember. We drank to forget.

Yuffie didn't drink.

Neither did I.

By morning, the majority of the house had a killer hangover. I found Tifa in the kitchen at lunchtime, preparing food for everyone. She smiled at me when I entered the room and asked me if I preferred ham or turkey, and when I asked her whatever for she replied that was my choice of lunch meat for my sandwich and that I'd better pick before there was any choice left as she had yet to ask anyone else.

No one complained when lunch was served, as most still had quite a headache. I was surprised when Cid complained of the pulsing of his head and the loudness of everyone else; out of all of them, I'd expected him to hold his liquor best. Cloud was mostly quite, and it was easy to tell that his hangover was minimal. Having been living with a bartender might do that. He, never the less, looked slightly uncomfortable as was normal for a man who drank more than normally accustomed to.

Marlene tugged on Tifa's shirt. "Where's Yuffie?"

I listened closely, without turning my head. I, too, was curious about Yuffie's absence. I was not, however, keen to let anyone else know of it.

Tifa ran her fingers through Marlene's hair, brushing bangs from the child's eyes. "Yuffie had work today, remember? At the bakery."

That sure piqued my interest. "Yuffie has a job?"

Looking up at me and smiling, Tifa shrugged. "She's changed. She said she didn't want to be a burden on Cloud and I, so she got a job at the local bakery here and has been making us take rent from her."

It must have been the apparently stupefied look plastered to my face that gave me away, because Tifa smiled. "Like I said, she's changed."

Dinner was served late in the evening, past dark, with everyone sitting in the living room on various sofas and couches. "We don't have a dining room, and the kitchen table only seats four," Tifa apologized as she handed out pieces of garlic bread. We all thanked her in turn, and assured her that no one was bothered by sitting in front of the TV for dinner.

I grew bored with whatever garbage that enthralled most everyone else in the room, and, after finishing my meal, set off to help Tifa clear the living room of dirty dishes. After picking up what was left after the first trip, Tifa and I passed the front door on the way to the kitchen in time for it to open.

Yuffie, donned in an apron, complete with flour in her hair, stepped into the house and removed her shoes next to the door. She looked at Tifa and I, waving a bag up with a smile on her face.

"When I told my boss that we were having a big party with all of our friends, he unloaded a whole tray of apple tarts into my bag and sent me home early!"

She placed the bag in front of Tifa and I, opening it up to show us the pastry treasures inside.

"Nice score," Tifa complimented, smiling. "Everyone will love them."

Yuffie grinned. "I'm gonna run up and jump in the shower real quick. Save some food for me, will ya?" With that, she disappeared up the stairs.

Tifa, still smiling, took the tarts from the bag and placed them on a tray for everyone to enjoy, being sure to save a few for Yuffie. I helped get a tray of dinner ready for when Yuffie came back down, but after a few minutes Tifa insisted that I should just take it up and give it to her in her bedroom so that she could finish at her leisure. I tried to object, stating that it wasn't too good of an idea for me to intrude upon Yuffie's room, but Tifa waved my concern off with a flick of her wrist and took the tray of tarts into the living room.

I stood outside the door to Yuffie's room, feeling stupid and anxious all at once, with a tray of food in hand and a stomach full of butterflies. I am fairly certain that Tifa had somehow planned this; it was, after all, the first time since my arrival that I'd been alone with Yuffie, not counting the momentary hello in the hall before.

Three knocks and no answer. I sighed, and opened the door a crack, calling out to the young woman inside. "Yuffie? I've brought you some dinner."

There was still no answer, so I slowly pushed the door open with my foot.

The room was empty. Fully know that I shouldn't, but unable to keep my curiosity under control, I placed the tray of food on the dresser next to the door and looked around Yuffie's bedroom. I was at once reminded of the room she'd occupied at the mansion, and a wave of grief washed over me.

I'd made her run.

It was my fault she'd left.

There, sitting in front of several pillows lying at the head of her bed, sat Boco, the black chocobo plush she'd won at the winter solstice festival we'd attended the winter before in Costa del Sol. I reached out and gave the bird a gentle pet, for good luck.

I should have looked around the room better; I hadn't seen the door to the attached bathroom when I'd entered Yuffie's bedroom.

I sure as hell saw it when the door opened and Yuffie walked out in her undergarments, drying her still damp hair with a towel.

"Shit!" I turned around, my back facing her. "I'm sorry. Tifa wanted me to bring up your dinner and you didn't open the door when I knocked so I brought it in and I didn't think you'd still be in the shower let alone have a bathroom attached to your bedroom-"

"Leviathan almighty, Vincent, slow down. It's not the end of the world."

I stood there with my back facing her, the image of her slim, and hardly clothed, body burnt into my mind. My heart was in my throat, and I felt like a teenager caught doing something awful.

My mouth opened and closed a few times as I attempted to form words, to form coherent sentences, but nothing fell past my lips save for a few rather undignified guttural sounds.

I heard as she shifted behind me, most likely moving her weight from one foot to another.

"Why didn't you come after me?"

I flinched like I'd been struck. After a moment of silence, I answered with the only thing I was able to formulate.

"I didn't know you wanted me to come after you."

The soft sound of her feet made their way closer to me as she walked closer. I felt her lay a hand against my back and I shuddered. Her voice was both soft and heavy as she spoke. "Of course I wanted you to come after me. That's why I left."

"I don't... I don't think I understand."

She sighed, and I knew she was not sure of herself. "If you... If you love something, you let it go. If it comes back, then you know..."

My heart skipped a beat, then jackhammered. I felt blood rush to my head. Did I just hear her right?

Did she... Did she say she loved me?

I turned around, swallowing hard, and faced her. Even though she kept her face downcast, I could still see the rosy hue her cheeks had taken. Reaching up a hand, I placed it against her cheek and brought her gaze up to mine.

No fear.

No repulsion.

Not even pity.

Just pure, innocent love.

For the first time, I let myself have something I wanted so completely I ached to have it.

I kissed her, and it was no chaste kiss like the one she'd given me when we'd fallen at the top of the stairs back at the mansion so many months ago. No, I poured all of my being into that kiss; my hope, my despair, my past and my present all wound up together in one giant package of self-pity and slight stupidity.

Fuck, why hadn't I done this sooner? Why _hadn't_ I come after her? I hadn't even thought of it.

It was half a moment after I began to kiss her that she kissed me back with just as much, if not more, intensity to match my own. I had my arms around her, lifting her off the ground, while she'd woven her hands through my hair and was trying to pull me closer.

It half startled me out of my mind when I could hear Chaos' gentle, satisfied purr reverberate through me. Well, at least I was making two people happy, myself not included.

I pulled away only long enough to look over Yuffie's shoulder so I could shut the door. In the small amount of time I'd been preoccupied, Yuffie had set to attacking my neck, biting me enough to mark my skin but not enough to draw blood. Swallowing, I tried to regain at least a little control. She took my ear lobe in her teeth, however, and pulled ever so gently, making any notion of control fly out the damned window.

In our tangled mess we'd somehow made it to the bed, miraculously, without tripping over the feet of the other. Placing my hands on her thighs, I lifted Yuffie up and sat her on the bed and then leaned over her, forcing her down into the soft, pillowed mattress. She raked her fingers across my scalp and through my hair, and I couldn't help the heated moan that slipped past my lips.

It was then I let go of everything.

My past, and my sins. My demons, and my anger.

Goodbye, he who I once was.

Goodbye, Lucrecia.

I felt Yuffie go from languid to stiff as a board in less than a heartbeat.

And I realized, with dread in my heart, that I'd said Lucrecia's name out loud.

I pulled back, completely floored my own stupidity. "Yuffie, I-"

"Get off."

"Please, Yuffie, let me-"

It never ceases to amaze me, how hard her little fists are.

The first time she punched me, I deserved it.

The second time she punched me, I wasn't quite in the wrong. I had just let my big mouth screw me over.

I wheeled backwards and away from the bed, holding the side of my face as I tired to stop the world from spinning.

I hadn't even time to gain another breath in hopes of explaining- Yuffie, tears already falling down her face, was headed for the bathroom. The door slammed behind her, and I heard the lock fasten with an thunderous click as I heard her punch the wall.

Staggering toward the door, I beat my fist against the wooden panel. "Yuffie, please, I-"

"GET OUT! GET AWAY FROM ME!"

She hadn't just yelled it, she had screamed it. I leaped away from the door, my heart in my throat, feeling terrible.

I tired to breath, but the room felt too small. I could hear the beginning of Yuffie's sobs from the other side of the door, and I cursed myself a thousand time a thousand deaths.

Then, a disturbing calm overcame me entirely.

Chaos had shoved his way past my defenses in my moment of turmoil.

There was no transformation; just the clean possession of my body for his uses. I was still seeing with my own eyes and hearing with my own ears, but I was incapable of moving any part of my body on my own. It was like some sick, twisted puppet show, and I played the part of the puppet, unable to escape that which controlled my body and compelled my actions.

I began to panic. Or at least I think I began to panic; it's very difficult to discern much of any individual feeling when placed into a position such as mine.

"Calm yourself." Chaos' deep voice rang out as I watched and felt my body head for Yuffie's window.

I heard Cloud and Tifa open the door to Yuffie's room the moment Chaos had navigated my body out of sight of the window.

'Give me back my body!'

It was weird to say something without actually speaking.

"I will," Chaos said through my lips. "But we need to have a bit of a chat first."

I knew Chaos was intelligent, but it was quite obvious I'd been selling him short.

My body walked itself out of town and into the vast and empty snow field that spanned between Kalm and the ocean.

"You have, quite honestly, some of the worst damn luck a human is physically capable of. I think perhaps the only reason you're still alive is because of me, among some of the others."

It was the most Chaos had ever spoken to me, and it was stranger still that it was coming out of my mouth yet lacked my voice.

"I brought you out here so you could cool down. You need a bit of a rest, and I feel it's time we have a little one on one."

'Chaos, give me my-'

"Valentine, I want nothing more than to go back to sleep within this silly body of yours, give you full control to fuck up your life even further, but you see we share a problem. Whatever you feel is forced upon me. See, when you become angry I become angry. When you become distressed, so do I. Not quite for the same reasons, it's to be said, but it's safe to say that I'm sick of the emotional bullshit roller coaster I've been riding for the past two years while you've been in the company of Miss Kisaragi."

I let that sink in for a moment.

"No, before you ask, it doesn't work the other way around. Trust me; I've become angry at you on more than one occasion but you've never so much as batted an eyelash."

'What are you planning on doing, now that you have control over me?'

I heard myself sigh. "If I wanted full custody of this body, it would be the easiest thing for me to obtain. Your simple human soul is easily overlapped by mine. That's not why I took control. I possessed you so I can give you some damned advice that might not get you socked in the face. I'm sick of your bullshit run-around with the girl."

'I'm trying. I-'

"You're doing nothing of the sort. Your mind was breaking down; that's why I hijacked you. To save you from yourself. You truly have a knack for messing things up, don't you?"

I was silent, debating whether I should seethe or simply let the conversation continue.

Chaos didn't give me much of a chance to think it over and simply began to speak through my mouth again.

"So, our little problem is thus; you didn't know you'd fallen in love with the girl until recently, have only let go of Lucrecia a short while ago, and have magnificently managed to screw yourself over with your newfound young love. This sounds like the trashy plot to one of those awful books you've been reading."

If I had control of my eyes, I would have rolled them.

"You know our solution, don't you?"

I hesitated, unsure of myself.

"You're going to let me talk to her."

Panic anew washed over me. 'What? No!'

"Face it. You know as well as I do that you're the last person on the face of the planet that she wants to see right now. You were kissing her and called out the name of your old girlfriend. Though you were only saying goodbye in a meaningful gesture of letting go, your mouth and brain weren't exactly on the same level. With all honesty, she most likely hates your guts as of now, Valentine. No way in Ifrit's fire would she listen to you. But, she might listen to me."

'But, I-'

"Look, I'm doing this because I'm sick of your bullshit. I swear, it's like watching the world's most dreadful soap opera. I'm tired of your ups and downs. It sounds cliché, I know, but I would rather like to see you happy for a change."

I let a moment of silence pass between us.

'Why haven't you taken control of me like this before?'

Chaos sighed. "Oh, please. Like owning the body of a mortal means shit to me. Yes, your lifespan will be much greater than that of a normal man, but this way I don't have the deal with ins and outs your silly human society seems to revolve around. Plus, after all the horrors you've gone through, I doubt you'd much appreciate my soul leaving your body. It might, to be honest, be too much for you to handle and your weak little human bones would most likely explode. Add the fact that I'm not sure I wouldn't damage my own soul on the way out, and you have a rather gruesome recipe for disaster. I'll leave when it's safe for the both of us, don't you worry. Now, are we going after the girl or are we going to play twenty questions all day evening long?"

This time, I didn't hesitate. 'Let's go.'

"Hold on tight to whatever you can, Valentine; your body might not like this too much."

'Like what?'

My question was answered horribly. I could feel my insides twist and my head pound with the ferocity of having been smacked repeatedly into a brick wall. Yet, before I had time to even ponder what Chaos was doing, we'd teleported outside of Yuffie's bedroom window.

Both of us paused.

"She's not here," Chaos finally announced.

'I can tell. Where has she gone, then?'

My vision scanned the window sill and the thin layer of snow beneath it. Fresh, little footprints could been seen it the snow, leading from Yuffie's bedroom window and into the town. Looking back toward the window, I noticed that a few of the things I'd noticed in Yuffie's bedroom were gone, like the chocobo plush from her bed.

"She ran."

I resisted the urge to throw a sarcastic 'I can see that' at Chaos, not knowing his take on humor. He seemed to speak rather dryly, so I figured it would end up better in the long run to hold my tongue.

'She couldn't have gone far.'

Fate was on both of our sides, if only for the moment. Both myself and Chaos seemed to pride ourselves with the fact that tracking came easy. We followed Yuffie's footprints into town and down an old, cluttered alleyway before making our way onto the plains that lead toward the chocobo ranch and the swamp.

We found her hardly half an hours' walk from town. She was bundled up for the cold weather, but even so Chaos and I easily recognized her.

Chaos moved my body up and over Yuffie's path, coming to rest in the snow in front of where she was walking. She have a shriek when she looked up and saw me floating down in front of her. That shock, however, quickly turned to anger ans she stamped her foot and pointed her finger toward me. "I told you to leave me the hell alone, Vincent Valentine!"

Chaos chuckled, and I felt my lips pull as he smiled.

Yuffie blinked, momentarily confused. The, her mouth hung open. "Not Vincent."

The grin on my face widened. "Clever girl."

I chided Chaos. 'Don't play with her.'

I watched as Yuffie's eyes grew large. "Chaos?"

Apparently, Chaos' had a very odd sense of humor. He theatrically bowed, throwing my cape behind me. As he straightened, he outstretched his hand. "You and I have a few things to discuss, Miss Kisaragi. If you'd be so kind?"

Yuffie took a step backwards, not out of fear but out of defiance. "I've nothing to say either of you." She crossed her arms across her chest and huffed.

Chaos extended the hand further. "We can do this the easy way, Miss Kisaragi, or we can do this my way."

Oh. Oh, Shiva, no. 'You shouldn't have done that.'

"What did you just say to me?"

Chaos took a step backward, taken aback over the ferocity in Yuffie's voice.

The last thing on earth you ever wanted to do was to give a pissed off Yuffie an ultimatum.

Stalking toward my body, Yuffie poked her index finger into my chest. "Let's get something straight, mister. I don't care who you are; you don't talk to me like that unless you have a death wish."

Chaos reached out and grabbed her hand. "So feisty. I can see why he picked you."

And, without even a moment's warning, Chaos had done his gut-wrenching teleportation trick again. It didn't surprise me one bit that after materializing Yuffie fell to her knees.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

The aftereffect of the sudden teleport was that of lightheadedness and heavy-nausea with a pounding headache all mixed together. It took a moment for my brain to unscramble for me to realize that Chaos had brought us back to the Shinra mansion in Nibelheim. We'd landed in the foyer.

Chaos decided it was time to lose the act. He bent down next to Yuffie and took her face in hand. "Miss Kisaragi, I must ask you listen to me now. I grow tired of this game. I'm here to tell you what is going on inside the deranged mind of the gunman who you were, until recently, so enamored with."

Yuffie averted her eyes. "He isn't over Lucrecia. What's there to understand?"

Heaving a sigh, Chaos continued. "Do you reside in Valentine's mind?"

She looked up, confused.

"Since you do not, please don't presume to know what he is thinking. I can assure you that with his kiss he was giving himself to you."

Yuffie smacked the hand that held her chin away. "I'm supposed to believe you? He called out her name, he-"

"I'm not finished."

She glared, but said nothing.

"As I was saying, with his kiss he was opening a part of himself up that has been closed off for far too long. You see, humans are social creatures; they crave the company of others. Vincent has spent so much time with only demons in his head, he doesn't seem too capable of normal human interaction. He plays the part of man well, but inside he thinks he is beast. Think on it; how many times, when you were all traveling together, did he honestly give an open opinion, or speak unless spoken to?"

Chaos stood and began to pace, a habit that seemed odd for a demon to have.

"He wasn't sure he was ready to let go of his last love. But, when you made your little confession earlier; well, all of his walls broke."

"He still called out her name when he was kissing me..."

"And if his brain had caught up with his mouth in time, you would have heard him say goodbye to her, as well as his former self. When you left those months ago he wallowed in self-pity and practically became a drunkard. The thought of chasing you never occurred to him simply because he never knew that's what he was able to do. He knew you were alive, but he'd resolved himself to thinking that you'd be better off without him as you'd left of your own free will."

Yuffie bit her lip.

Chaos knelt next to her, taking her face up in his hands again. "Please, at least give him another chance. I'm so sick of him being so depressed all the time; it's time he was happy."

It took a moment before Yuffie reacted. "Alright. But no more of this possession stuff. It's creepy."

One last smile was earned from Chaos. "I seldom make promises."

Being let back into and gaining control of my body was, easily, the most physically uncomfortable thing I'd ever experienced. I crumpled to the floor, holding my stomach.

'My apologies; I didn't know your body wouldn't take well to teleporting when I'm not in my full form. Well, I've done all I care to. The rest is up to you.'

I gagged, reaching my hand out and grasping Yuffie's. "I'm going to vomit," I shakily announced.

Yuffie sighed. "Man, is this what I'm like?" She hefted one of my arms over her shoulder and helped me stand, leading the way up the stairs and into the bathroom.

She pulled the hair away from my face as I emptied the contents of my stomach into the toilet.

"See?" She mused, more to herself than to me. "This is why I'm glad I keep my hair so short."

I would have smiled if I wasn't dry heaving.

After my stomach had nothing left to empty and my heaves had all but subsided, Yuffie helped me from the bathroom down the hall. When she started to steer for my room, I pointed to her door.

She said nothing as she opened the door to her once bedroom and led me inside. I huddled up on the bed, feeling awful. Kindly, she pulled off my shoes and unfastened my cloak from my shoulders.

"Well, wasn't that something." It wasn't how I would have broken the silence between us, but I suppose I should take what little I could. I was shaking now, my body exhausted.

I tried to open my mouth to apologize, but she disappeared out the door and down the hallway.

Blind panic struck me. Oh, summons above she was leaving me again. I stumbled from the bed and tumbled to the floor, crawling on my hands and knees like

I fumbled into the hall and collided with a pair of knees. "Vincent, what the hell? Get back into bed!"

Relief washed over me like a bucket of cold water. I reached out and groped the wall and, with her help, stood on shaking legs and made my way back into the bedroom. I collapsed on the bed, so tired...

She moved my arms and legs, positioning me so that I would be more comfortable. Then, she reached a hand up and dabbed my forehead with a wet washcloth.

I was the most strained silence that passed between us. She looked at my face, moved my hair from my eyes, but never once met my gaze.

When she turned to move off the bed, I caught her wrist. My voice was ragged, my throat raw.

"Don't go."

It took a moment, but a soft smile eventually befell her face. "I'll stay."

She moved to sit on the edge of the bed, but with my last remaining strength I pulled her next to me. Requiring no further directions, she stretched out beside to me and sighed.

"Don't go." It was Chaos who reiterated.

"I said I would stay."

I rolled over and buried my face in her neck, lying half atop of her. "Don't go." I sighed as darkness overcame me.


	15. Chapter 15

Reason to Live

By mihoyonagi

Chapter 15

I woke up in the same position I'd fallen asleep. Yuffie was running a hand through my hair, absentmindedly humming a soft, gentle tune.

"I'm sorry," I blurted before I had the chance to think. "I should have come after you, I shouldn't have acted so-"

"You're horrible at pillow talk, you know that?"

I choked, laughing slightly.

Yuffie continued to run her fingers through my hair. "I'm staying, but there are some things I need."

"Anything."

I felt her smile against me as soon as the word had left my mouth.

"I want to make sure you've let go. If you want me, you get all of me or not at all, and the same in reverse; if you want a relationship with me-"

"Anything."

The soft up and down motion of her chest as she laughed against me made me smile, made things inside of me turn and flip and rejoice.

I wish I'd realized what she'd meant to me before I had to learn the lesson the hard way. "I'll tell you once and I'll tell you again; anything for you."

"Let me leave my socks on the bathroom floor."

I pushed back so I could look down at her and I laughed harder than I had in a long time. "I'll let you leave your socks where ever you please, but don't come running to me when the scissors find them where they shouldn't be."

Yuffie tried to pout, the smile on her face was too large to be covered. "You said anything."

I dipped my head down and kissed her, gently. Pulling back, I sighed. "Anything within reason. Misplaced socks are not reasonable."

She closed her eyes and laughed, running her fingers through my hair and guiding me downward for another kiss.

It was electric, but not overpowering, being in the arms of a woman who didn't care of my past, who didn't pity me for that which was done to me, who didn't fear the monsters inside of me.

Yuffie pulled away, looking up at me expectantly. "I'm hungry." It was a statement, and from the look on her face she expected me to pacify her. I stood and pulled her to her feet, and together, hand in hand, we made our way to the kitchen.

"I don't have much food around. I ate mostly out of necessity than enjoyment while you were gone."

Either she was ignoring me, or she had nothing to say. She let go of my hand and inspected the cupboards, setting to work.

We made pancakes from the powdered mix we found in the pantry; we opened cans of fruit in heavy syrup; we fried a few eggs; we had a decent breakfast, despite our lack of food.

And we fed one another, smiling and laughing and feeling lighthearted and empty-headed.

It was most ease I'd felt in over three decades. The young woman in front of me, with her sweet smile and deep laugh, had saved me when nothing else in the world could, or had even tried. I plucked a peach from the bowl it we had dumped the rest of the can, and held it up to her lips.

Smiling, Yuffie took it. She chewed it, and giggled as she wiped the back of her hand on her skin, ridding her face of the peach juice that had escaped.

I leaned down, feeling contented, and kissed her.

She tasted of the peaches I'd fed her.

And the weeks that flew by were peaceful and full of smiles.

I was determined to take it slow; there would be no scaring her, no chasing either of us off with silly embarrassments or a move too soon. She'd reach for my hand while in town, and I'd do nothing to discourage her. That, of course, only encouraged the townsfolk who noticed she had simply shown up in the middle of the night. Yuffie's favorite story was that the beast had mourned for so long, alone in his castle without his lady, that his grief and longing reached to her and she rushed to his side.

We didn't correct them, but we sure as hell had a good laugh each time we heard a new variant of the story. It was rather wrong of us to get so much joy out of something that, honestly, was rather morbid, but with each new change to the story we cared less and laughed more.

The only downside was having to deal with Cloud and the others. Based off what the situation had looked like when we had left, it was quite understandable when Tifa stormed through the front door, fire in her eyes, finger jabbing me in the chest while she verbally tore into me.

Yuffie stayed silent, but only for a few moments. Unable to hold herself together, she began to giggle uncontrollably. Cloud, looking just as pissed, turned from me back to Yuffie, and then raised a hand to his forehead as if he had a migraine.

It took a few reassuring words before Tifa calmed down, but the fire finally subsided and before long she understood what had happened.

Although, Yuffie had thankfully left out the part where I had picked her up, while she'd been clad in nothing but her undergarments, and nearly had my way with her...

Yes, well, anyway.

Tifa and Cloud, filled with reassuring words and smiles, although I was extremely uncomfortable the entire time, eventually left.

I glared at Yuffie when they'd vacated the foyer, making a theatrical point of rolling my eyes.

"Oh, whatever; I just saved your ass. Could you imagine the look on Tifa's face if I'd told her the real situation and the state of dress I'd been in?"

I felt my face warm under my blush. It had been a long time since I'd been so close to a woman, and it's easy to say I'd never truly spent time with a woman so forward as Yuffie. She was never afraid to speak her mind, a trait I could both admire or detest, depending completely on the situation.

"Stop that," she chided me playfully, tugging me down for a swift kiss before she bounded off to do only Leviathan knows what.

It was summer before long, and Yuffie was growing impatient during the long, hot days. The mansion stayed somewhat cool, what with being nestled so nicely against the mountains, but there were days even I was forced to rid myself of my shirt. That earned a few cat-calls from my little self-proclaimed ninja, but it was more out of teasing than anything else.

Over dinner some hot night – simple sandwiches, as neither of us dared to touch the oven or the stove for fear we'd catch fire – we decided to take some of our rainy-day Gil and spend a little time traveling. Yuffie insisted on the Gold Saucer, complaining that she never got to have as much fun as she'd wanted during the first run-though with Cloud. Not having a better idea, I conceded, and by the next weekend we were packed up in the buggy and making our way across the land.

We started our adventure off by ordering room service and spending the first night simply resting. The ride had taken longer than both of us expected, and Yuffie ended up becoming mildly carsick so we figured that it was best to wait until the morning before we started to have fun.

Yuffie woke me up by jumping from her bed onto mine, laughing childishly. "Wake up, come on! We've got stuff to do!"

And it was quite the day, to be sure; we had breakfast at one of the restaurants that lined the chocobo track, watched a rather silly play, fought a few rounds at the battle arena, and played cheap arcade games until our wrists and elbows hurt.

It was nearing midnight, and we were enjoying the beauty of the gondola. We watched a colorful rainbow of chocobos run past. The fireworks exploded against the night sky like shards of illuminated glass falling from the heavens.

"Do you still want me?"

The question caught me so off guard I almost thought I'd imagined it. But when I looked to Yuffie I could see the faint blush on her cheeks as she made a point to avoid my gaze.

"If I didn't, I wouldn't be here."

It didn't seem to be the answer she was searching for, though I wasn't certain of what she expected. I watched as she opened her mouth a few times, as though she'd thought of s a response then quickly changed her mind over speaking it aloud.

I reached out and placed a hand on her knee. "No secrets; tell me what's bothering you."

She huffed a few times, still looking like she was looking for the right words to say. "It's been almost half a year."

I raised an eyebrow. "Since what?"

It was then she looked up at me, her face flushed and her eyes concerned. "Since we got together."

Pondering for a moment, I nodded. "That's about right, yes. What about it?"

She sighed and crossed her arms, looking away from me. "You're moving too slow, dammit."

I nearly chocked. Had I heard her right? Was she - but I – did she want me to-

"Sweet, chaste kisses can only keep me satisfied for so long, Vincent."

The gondola lurched to an unsteady halt.

So did my brain.

I started at her, baffled. I was worried I would have scared her off had I move too fast, and here she was telling me to get quit beating around the bush.

To be fair, however, she was no longer the young woman I'd first met. She would be 19 in a handful of months...

I guess I'd forgotten how much she had changed since she'd first come to live with me.

Boldness overtook me.

I took her by the wrist and stood, exiting the gondola and tugging her behind me. I could sense her unease and I didn't blame her considering I'd not said a word and merely directed her to follow me without much choice. Let her live with the anxiety for a moment; it would be the least of her worries soon.

I may be a gentleman, but I'm no clod; I'd been taking our relationship slow for Yuffie's sake, unwilling to offend or scare her. The last thing I wanted was to push her into a situation in which she felt uncomfortable in. Regardless, I still had a little bit of man left in me, and that bit of me had been watching the gentle sway of Yuffie's hips when she walked in front of me, the gentle rise and fall of her breasts as she slept with her head in my lap while I read, had paid great attention to her long, delicate fingers, her tiny, round mouth, and-

Leviathan spare me, it was like her words had opened the damn floodgate of hormones in me.

I opened the door to our room at the inn and tugged her inside behind me. I gently pulled her out of the way, shutting the door behind us and, for good measure, placing the chain lock on the door.

When I turned to face her, she was a bundle of nerves obviously not knowing what to expect. "I'm sorry," she held out her hands in front of her as if surrendering. "I didn't mean to be so blunt; I didn't mean to offend you. I just-"

I cut her short with a fierce kiss.

She I pulled back she gazed up at me, the color in her cheeks rising no longer for embarrassment but for something else entirely.

I reached behind me and, without another word between us, turned off the lights.

I listened as her breath stilled, almost amused by the fact the fact that she, very obviously, hadn't expected me to act so boldly.

And bold I was. I tugged at my shirt, pulling it over my head and discarding it to the floor as I took a step toward her. I could easily see her despite the dark of our room; my senses were, after all, enhanced. Even so, I knew she could see my outline, and easily tell what I was doing. I reached down and unbuttoned my pants... and stopped.

Despite the gigantic leap I was taking, there would be no pushing. If she so much as pulled away I would stop in a heartbeat. Which meant that while I'd rid myself of my shirt, she was the one who would have to take the next step.

It took her a moment to react; it was small, subtle, but it was a start. She took a step toward me and placed a tiny hand against my chest. I took a deep breath, feeling her warm skin against mine.

I let her explore. Relaxing, I leaned over her as she set her other hand against my skin. I watched her smile.

"What?" I teased gently.

Her smile grew. "For some reason, I thought you'd have scars across your chest."

I tilted my head quizzically.

"From all the experiments."

Ah. "I used to have scars. But, my body heals differently than yours would."

"Oh." There were no further questions; her curiosity had been appeased by an easy and truthful answer, and she began, once again, to trace her fingers along my chest.

Her hands brushed up and down my abs, and I unwillingly flexed at the sensation. "You're strong."

"Is that so?"

She didn't reply. Instead, it was her turn to be bold and daring. Taking a step toward me, Yuffie pressed her chest against mine. Delicately, she placed her hand on the back of my neck and pulled me down for gentle, sweet kiss.

Ahh, but chaste kisses wouldn't satisfy her forever, would they? I placed my hands on her hips and deepened the kiss, pulling softly at her bottom lip with my teeth. There was no resistance; she opened her lips against me within an instant.

Tentatively, I tugged at her shirt; a pleading, silent question in which I wouldn't push. Yuffie, however, had let herself go; no longer could I hear her breath shake. She pushed my hands away, took a step backward, and pulled the shirt off, tossing it somewhere in the dark. Just like I had, she unbuttoned the top of her pants and waited.

Who was I to deny her? I tucked a thumb into the waistband of her pants and, while I kissed a gentle line down her neck, I pushed them to the floor. She lifted one foot, then the other, and hooked a toe on her clothing so she could toss it out of our way.

I pushed her against the wall and fell to my knees in front of her, kissing sweet trails around her navel and all along her stomach. Reaching behind her, I unclasped her bra and let it slide off her lithe frame.

The low moan she made when I took a nipple in my mouth made my world, and my pants, seem far too small. While my mouth paid attention to one breast, I cupped the other and listened as she mewled, apparently not accustomed to such worship.

She raked her fingernails against my scalp and earned a hiss from me. Arching her back, she pressed against me as if in a fever and I the cure.

"Vincent," she gasped when my mouth paid homage to her other breast.

My patience was wearing thin, as was my self restraint. I stood and crushed her against the wall, claiming her mouth with my own, feeling both lightheaded and lighthearted. Cupping her rear, I picked her up and wound her legs around my waist, making my way slowly to the bed. She held on tightly, even as I leaned over and crawled atop the bed, pinning her down against the mattress.

I pushed against her hips, forcing her down against the cotton comforter, while rotating my own, earning her fingernails digging into my shoulders.

"Leviathan be damned, Valentine; take your pants off." It was hissed command, one that, given the tone of need in her voice I shouldn't have ignored. Yet, I had to, for I had other plans.

When she moved her hands toward my waistline, I stilled her wrists and shushed her, unwinding her legs from my waist and tracing my lips across her taught stomach. The long whine that fell from her lips stopped my breath and nearly made me lose control. I took a deep breath, refilling my lungs, and composed myself. No matter how I wanted her, I'd make sure to please her first; if she remembered anything from this night, it would be that she couldn't walk by morning. My lips pulled in a slight smirk when I thought of that; the always emotive Yuffie Kisaragi rendered motionless, wordless, exhausted, because of me... I very much enjoyed that mental image.

The tight gasp that sounded when I kissed the top of her pink and white speckled panties made my toes curl. Her breath hitched and she whined as I tugged at the thin elastic with a curled finger, pulling the fabric down past her knees.

But nothing came close to the sound she made and the effect it had on me as I pushed her legs apart and delicately kissed her most secret of places. Even Chaos growled within me as I lavished her with sweet yet rough kisses. Each lash of my tongue pried her delicate senses apart piece by piece until she took great fistfuls of my hair and called out my name, arching her back and mewling and thrashing about without aplomb.

Even I was panting when I'd finished with her. She reached out, traced her shaking arms up my own so they could twine around my neck and I crawled over her, looking down at her rosy cheeks and full lips and delighted eyes. I could feel her heart, deafening and rhythmic, as it pumped.

I smiled against her neck, laying delicate kisses on her smooth, warm skin.

When I began to trace my hands down her waist, she tugged at my hair and forced me to look up.

"No more games, you sadistic bastard; just fuck me already."

I laughed, wholeheartedly and pleased with myself in ways I hadn't known I could be. She ended up laughing too, more at my laughing than at her statement, and we made love over and over and over again until someone from the front desk rang our room and told us if they received another noise complaint they were going to have to kick us out.

Yuffie laughed as I hung up the phone, looking like a pleased cat caught in a bowl of cream. "We'll just have to finish this at home."

And if I were to say that we lived happily ever after, it would make me a liar.

We did live mostly happily from then on, but as no one is perfect, and given that we were who we were, Yuffie and I got into the occasional lover's spat and even went to bed angry more times than we should have. But harsh words are easily mended when a verbal argument is the least of what you've gone through together, even before your relationship had started.

I often spouted that I never believed in fairy-tale endings, but everyone holds secrets and I suppose one of mine was that while I didn't _believe_ in them, I truly wished that there were people lucky enough in the world to have the love that I somehow managed to grab hold of. You cannot say we had a fairy-tale ending because, while our story might have seemed fantastic what with the horrible monster turning true and winning the heart of the princess, we were simply not made for stories.

Although, it was a rather happy ending on my part as Yuffie was true to her word and I never again found a stray sock on the bathroom floor.


End file.
